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A Sinking Feeling

Ivan Aivazovsky's painting Walking on Water (1888)

Ivan Aivazovsky’s painting Walking on Water (1888) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Can we go back to last week’s Bible story, person? The one where Jesus fed all those people and they had lots of leftovers for me?

What? You’re going to tell me a different story? Well, there’d better be food in it then.

***

After Jesus fed all the people…

***

And I ate the leftovers.

I am listening.

***

Jesus urged his disciples to get into the boat and head across the lake for Capernaum while He dismissed the crowd.

After the crowd left, Jesus went up on a mountain to pray and when evening came he was there alone.

***

I wonder if Jesus would like me to come and give him some loves.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The boat the disciples were in was already way out on the lake and it was being tossed around on the waves because the wind was against it.

***

I hope those disciples didn’t get sea sick.

***

In the middle of the night Jesus took a walk on the lake and headed for the disciples. When the disciples saw Jesus they thought He was a ghost and they were terrified.

But Jesus told them it was Him and said not to be afraid.

***

I wouldn’t be afraid. I’d jump into the water with Jesus.

I wonder if he has any sticks for me to fetch.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Peter said, “Lord, if it’s you tell me to come to you on the water.

Jesus said, “Come.”

Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus.

***

Did Peter jump right in with a big splash. That’s what I would do.

***

When Peter saw the wind he was afraid and began to sink. He cried out to Jesus, “Lord, save me!”

***

Why doesn’t Peter just do the dog paddle?

***

Immediately Jesus reached out His hand and caught Peter. And Jesus said to Peter, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”

When Jesus and Peter climbed into the boat the wind died down. Those who were in the boat worshiped Jesus and said, “Truly you are the Son of God.”

***

I sure hope that when Peter started sinking he felt some fish swimming around his feet and grabbed them. All this walking on water is making me hungry.

 
18 Comments

Posted by on June 30, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Calm the Storm

Jesus calming the stormOne day when Jesus was waiting for all the seeds to grow into good food…

I know that’s not how the story goes, but don’t you agree it’s better if there’s food in the story?

Okay, I’ll listen to the right story.

***

One day when Jesus had a crowd around Him He said to his disciples, “Let’s go over to the other side of the lake.”

So they got into a boat and set out.

***

I hope they brought their fishing nets.

I am listening.

***

While they were sailing, Jesus fell asleep.

Without warning, a furious storm came up on the lake and the waves swept over the boat.

***

Hold on to those fishing nets, disciples!

***

The disciples woke Jesus up and said to Him, “Don’t you care if we drown?”

Jesus got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!”

The wind died down and it was completely calm.

***

Time for fishing now.

Yes, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?

The disciples were terrified and asked each other, “Who is this? Even the wind and waves obey Him!”

***

The fish obey Jesus too. Maybe he could have a few jump into the boat.

Hey guys, wait for me! I don’t want to miss any of those fish!

 
16 Comments

Posted by on May 19, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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A Fish Story

Jesus and the miraculous catch of fish, in the...

Jesus and the miraculous catch of fish, in the Sea of Galilee, by Raphael (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is it! This is what I’ve been waiting for.

A fish story!

Jesus got into a fishing boat, so there’s gotta be fish around. Right?

Okay, I’ll listen. But can I have some fish treats to munch on while I’m listening?

People eat popcorn at the movies. Shouldn’t dogs be allowed some treats when they hear stories?

***

Jesus was standing by the Sea of Galilee and people were crowding around him and listening to him teach about the word of God. There were two fishing boats there and the fishermen were nearby washing their nets. So Jesus got into the boat belonging to Simon and asked him to put out a little from shore, and he taught the people from the boat.

***

I wish I had been there. I could have gone swimming right up to that boat. Were there any fish in it?

I am listening.

***

When Jesus had finished speaking he told Simon to put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.

But Simon said they’d been working hard all night and hadn’t caught anything.

***

Oh, so there weren’t any fish in that boat. I’m jumping out and swimming back to shore.

***

Because Jesus had told Simon to let down his nets, he did it. And when they did, they caught so many fish that their nets began to break. They had to signal their partners, James and John, to bring their boat over to help them. They filled both boats so full that they began to sink.

***

Guess I’d better swim back and help those boats out now.

I am listening. What did you think I was doing?

***

Simon Peter fell on his knees and said, “Go away from me Lord; I am a sinful man!” because he and his companions were astonished at all the fish they had caught.

But Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Don’t be afraid. From now on you will be fishers of men.”

And they pulled their boats up on shore, left everything and followed Jesus.

***

They left their boats full of fish there? Woo woo! I’m staying with the boats!

 
19 Comments

Posted by on February 24, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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A Net Full of Fish

The Miraculous Draught of Fishes, 1515, one of...

The Miraculous Draught of Fishes, 1515, one of the seven remaining Raphael Cartoons for tapestries. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Some of Jesus’ disciples went fishing after he was resurrected? Why didn’t they take me? I like fish.

Oh, they didn’t? They fished all night and didn’t catch anything? I guess I’m glad I wasn’t with them after all. Were they sleeping in the boat?

I’m listening, person. I didn’t fall asleep. Really. I just think those disciples must have fallen asleep. They must have been really hungry when they woke up. They didn’t have any fish to eat. What did they do?

They what? They saw a man on the shore and he asked them if they didn’t have any fish? I bet he saw them sleeping in the boat.

Okay person, I’ll listen.

When the disciples told the man they didn’t have any he told them to throw their net on the right side of the boat and they would find some. They did and they got so many fish they couldn’t haul in the net. I don’t get it, person. Do fish only swim on the right side of the boat? I’ll have to remember that if I ever get to go fishing.

Oh, I forgot. Okay, I’m listening now. One of the disciples, John, recognized Jesus then and Peter got so excited he jumped out of the boat and swam to shore. I’d be jumping out with Peter. That sounds like fun.

Jesus had breakfast ready for those hungry fishermen. He’d cooked some fish and had some bread. I hope they saved some for me.

Oh yeah, they had all those fish in the net. They counted them and there were 153. Wow, that’s a lot of fish. I wonder if they’d notice if one was missing.

Okay person, I promise I won’t steal any fish. But I think they have more than they need.

After the disciples finished breakfast Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved him. When Peter said yes Jesus told him to take care of his sheep and then he told him to feed his sheep.

I wonder what Peter is going to feed those sheep with. I don’t think they eat fish.

 
22 Comments

Posted by on April 15, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Walk or Swim?

Jesus Walking on WaterWhat!? No animals and no food in this story? I don’t want to listen then. I’m outta here.

Water? Did you say water? A big lake? One that I can go swimming in? I like swimming. Okay, I’ll listen. But this better be good.

This one happened right after last week’s story huh? Right after Jesus fed all those people. I’m getting hungry now. You’re making me hungry thinking about those fish.

Okay, I’m listening.

My person says that after Jesus fed all those people he sent his disciples off in a boat to go to the other side of the lake they were at. Is this lake bigger than my swimming hole?

What? They’d gone three or three and a half miles and they were in the middle of the lake? I think that’s bigger person. Is that bigger?

Okay, I’m really listening this time.

My person said Jesus had gone up on a mountainside to be by himself and pray, and then in the early hours of the morning – somewhere between 3:00 and 6:00 AM – he decided to go meet up with the disciples.

Did the disciples leave Jesus a boat?

They didn’t? He’s going to swim all that way? I could swim with him. That would be fun. Do you think he’d throw some sticks for me to fetch?

No way! How’s he going to do that? Walk on the water!? And it was windy with lots of waves? I’ve got to see this.

My person says Jesus walked all that way on the water and when he got to the boat the disciples thought he was a ghost and they were scared. I’m not afraid of ghosts. After all, I’ve made friends with Ghost Dog.

Well, Jesus told the disciples not to be afraid – that it was him and not a ghost. Once the disciple Peter realized it was Jesus he wanted to go out walking on the water too, so Jesus told him to come on out.

I’d like to go out in that water too.

So Peter got out of the boat and I followed him. I just wanted to swim but Peter started walking on the water. Wow! I didn’t know Peter could do that.

I guess Peter didn’t know he could do that either, because when he saw how windy it was he got scared and started sinking. Peter cried out for Jesus to save him. Jesus reached out his hand and caught Peter and told him he didn’t have enough faith.

Jesus and Peter climbed into the boat, but they had to reach down and pull me in. I didn’t know it was so hard to get into a boat from the water. Okay person, I know I wasn’t really there, but it’s fun to pretend.

After Peter and Jesus got into the boat – and pulled me in – the wind died down. The disciples in the boat worshipped Jesus and said that truly he was the Son of God.

Now that there’s no wind, can we go back in the water again? Maybe James and John would like to come with us too. And how about Ghost Dog? I bet he’d like to go swimming.

 

 Image courtesy karenswhimsy

 
24 Comments

Posted by on January 29, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Boat Ride Anyone?

Noah's ArkI was really upset when my person told me the Bible story of creation and I found out we were only allowed to eat plants. No meat! It just isn’t fair.

Well, my person told me all that changes so I hope she’s coming through. She said she’d tell me another story and it even has animals in it, but I’m only listening if I get to eat meat.

My person said that this story happened a long time ago and everyone on earth was very bad. Everyone except one man, that is. And God came to this man and told him to build an ark. I asked my person what an ark was and she said it was a big boat. Okay, so is this story about boats or meat?

My person told me to lie down and listen and she’d get to it. I wasn’t very happy about it but I figured I could go to sleep if she kept talking about boats.

This man who had to build the boat was named Noah. It took him a long time to build it because God told him to make a really big boat. My person said he probably wasn’t anywhere near a large lake or the ocean and all the bad people around him probably came and made fun of him.

I don’t know about Noah, but I think I’m ready to give this story up. Boats, bad people, and Noah. I haven’t seen any animals and where’s the beef?

I started to walk away and my person grabbed me by the collar and made me stay. Then she told me that not only did God tell Noah to build a big boat, He also told Noah to collect two of every kind of animal. When Noah finished the boat they’d all get in it and go for a ride.

I’m not sure I’d want to ride in a boat. I might get seasick. I guess I’d be okay in Noah’s boat though. It didn’t have a sea to make me sick.

My person said all that changed. When Noah finished the boat and he and his family and all the animals got inside, God made it start raining – a bunch. And that rain kept up for forty days and forty nights and flooded everything and wiped out all the bad people. But Noah and all those animals had to stay on that boat for a year before all that water went away.

Finally God told Noah that everybody could leave the ark, and He promised Noah and all the animals that He wouldn’t send a flood like that again. He said His rainbow would be the sign of His promise.

I still felt very hungry and started to head toward the door so my person could let me outside when she said the story wasn’t quite over. I turned around and looked at her. She said that in the beginning God had given all the green plants to eat. When Noah and everybody got off the boat, God told them they could also eat meat.

Yes!!! I’m saved. I’m pushing the veggies aside. Please pass the meat platter.

 

Bongo with a Bone

 
24 Comments

Posted by on November 13, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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