RSS

Tag Archives: Christ

It’s Not Over Yet

13 Apr
Jesus Crucifixion

Photo taken by Kabir Bakie at the Cincinnati Zoo

Hey person, I’ve been worried all week about what’s going to happen to Jesus.

You ended the story too soon.

They arrested Him, but I don’t know what happened after that.

He didn’t do anything wrong.

They let Him go, didn’t they?

What!?

They didn’t!

Those garbaldy goo good for nothing people that arrested Him. I’ll give them what for.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus was put on trial and even though Pilate, the Roman governor, didn’t find anything he’d done wrong the Jews wanted Him crucified.

So Pilate finally agreed and sent Jesus to be crucified.

***

I’m giving Pilate what for too!

I am listening.

***

Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with Jesus to be executed.

When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified Him, along with the criminals – one on His right, the other on His left. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

***

I don’t get it. They just nailed Jesus to a cross and He wants to forgive them?

I’m gonna give them all what for.

I’m listening. I’m listening.

***

And they divided up Jesus’ clothes by casting lots.

***

It’s too bad I don’t wear clothes, or I’d give Him some of mine.

***

The people stood watching, and the rulers even sneered at Him. They said, “He saved others; let Him save Himself if He is the Christ of God, the Chosen One.”

***

Those rulers better watch it. If Jesus doesn’t give them what for I sure will.

***

The soldiers also came up and mocked Him. They offered him wine vinegar and said “If you are the king of the Jews, save yourself.”

There was a written notice above Him, which read: THIS IS THE KING OF THE JEWS.

***

How come those people don’t believe what they’re reading?

They should be worshipping The King of the Jews.

***

One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at Him: “Aren’t you the Christ? Save yourself and us!”

But the other criminal rebuked him. “Don’t you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence? We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.

***

I don’t get it. The only man who is making any sense is hanging on a cross along with Jesus.

***

Then the man said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

Jesus answered him, “I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise.”

***

I bet that upset all the people who were giving Jesus a bad time.

I’m listening.

***

It was now about the sixth hour, and darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour, for the sun stopped shining.

***

That was what time?

The middle of the day?

***

And the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Jesus called out with a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.” When He had said this He breathed His last.

***

What!?

That’s not how the story’s supposed to end.

It doesn’t end there?

Okay, I’m listening.

***

The centurion, seeing what had happened, praised God and said, “Surely this was a righteous man.”

***

That’s it!?

That’s the end?

Oh. It’s not over yet?

What do you mean, I have to wait till next Sunday to hear the rest of the story?

This is gonna be a long week.

 
16 Comments

Posted by on April 13, 2014 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Not His Sheep

03 Nov

sheepHey person, I’ve been really good all week. I didn’t dig up any seeds, but no trees have grown for me to leave messages on.

Maybe some other dog dug up that mustard seed that Jesus planted when I wasn’t looking.

You’ve got a new story to tell me?

But I’m still waiting for that mustard seed to grow.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The Feast of Dedication at Jerusalem had come and Jesus was in the temple area walking in Solomon’s Colonnade. The Jews gathered around him, saying, “How long will you keep us in suspense? If you are the Christ, tell us plainly.”

***

They could have just read the Bible to find out.

I am listening.

***

Jesus answered, “I did tell you, but you do not believe. The miracles I do in my Father’s name speak for me, but you do not believe because you are not my sheep.”

***

Jesus has sheep? I didn’t know He was a shepherd. I thought He was a carpenter.

I’m listening, but I just want to know where the sheep come in.

***

Jesus continued, “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”

***

Okay, so Jesus’ Father got tired of being a carpenter and became a shepherd and then He gave the sheep to Jesus and went back to being a carpenter. I’m all confused.

What? Jesus had two fathers? I give up.

***

The Jews picked up stones to stone Jesus, but Jesus said to them, “I have shown you many great miracles from the Father. For which of these do you stone me?”

***

Oh, now I get it. I think. There’s the miracle Father and the carpenter father. But how come Jesus got so lucky to have two fathers?

If I listen will this make sense?

***

“We are not stoning you for any of these,” replied the Jews, “but for blasphemy, because you, a mere man, claim to be God.”

***

This story is really confusing. First there’s an extra father, and then the Jews want Jesus to tell them something and when He does they want to stone Him.

I don’t think I’d be telling the truth if it meant someone was going to stone me.

***

Jesus answered the Jews, “Is it not written in your Law, ‘I have said you are gods’? If he called them ‘gods,’ to whom the word of God came – and the Scripture cannot be broken – what about the one whom the Father set apart as His very own and sent into the world? Why then do you accuse me of blasphemy because I said, ‘I am God’s Son’? Do not believe me unless I do what my Father does. But if I do it, even though you do not believe me, believe the miracles, that you may know and understand that the Father is in me, and I in the Father.”

***

That’s too many big words for me. I think I’ll just go chase the sheep.

***

Again they tried to seize Jesus, but He escaped their grasp.

***

Hey Jesus, wait for me! I think I found one of your sheep.

 
22 Comments

Posted by on November 3, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Take up your Cross

07 Jul
English: Christ Handing the Keys to St. Peter ...

English: Christ Handing the Keys to St. Peter by Pietro Perugino (1481-82) Fresco, 335 x 550 cm Cappella Sistina, Vatican. Ελληνικά: Λεπτομέρεια από την νωπογραφία του Πιέτρο Περουτζίνο, Ο Χριστός Παραδίδει τα Κλειδιά στον Πέτρο, 335 x 600 cm, Καπέλα Σιξτίνα, Πόλη του Βατικανού. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey person, I don’t know if I like this next Bible story. Can’t you just tell another one about swimming – or fishing?

Okay, I’ll listen to the story. But if there’s no fish in it I want some treats when you’re finished.

***

Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi and he asked his disciples, “Who do people say I am?”

***

I know who he is. He’s the guy who makes lots of fish appear.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

The disciples replied to Jesus, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

“But what about you?” Jesus asked. “Who do you say I am?”

Simon Peter answered, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

***

God must really love us to send His Son to give us lots of fish.

I am listening, but don’t you think that was a really important observation I just made?

***

Jesus told Peter he was blessed because it was the Father in heaven who revealed to him who Jesus is, and He told His disciples not to tell anyone that He is the Christ.

Then He began to explain to His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, chief priests, and teachers of the law, and that He must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.

***

Wouldn’t the disciples protect Jesus?

***

Peter had that idea and he began to rebuke Jesus saying, “Never, Lord. This shall never happen to you!”

***

I bet Jesus felt better after that.

***

This is what Jesus said to Peter. “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men.”

***

I bet Peter tucked his tail between his legs after that.

***

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?”

***

If I have to deny myself to follow Jesus, does that mean I have to give up treats?

 
12 Comments

Posted by on July 7, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

It’s St. Patrick’s Day!

17 Mar
Statue of St. Patrick in Aughagower, County Mayo

Statue of St. Patrick in Aughagower, County Mayo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Hey person. I don’t have anything green on. Can you get me a green bandana or something? I don’t want Scratchy to pinch me.

Hey, wait a minute. Scratchy isn’t wearing anything green either. Maybe I can go pinch him.

Scratchy, come here.

Oh. Scratchy just told me I’m supposed to be telling a Bible story. It is Bible story day, isn’t it? Why are we talking about St. Patrick’s Day?

Because St. Patrick brought Christianity to Ireland? He did?

So you’re going to tell me about St. Patrick today instead?

Okay, but I need my green first.

Yes, I’ll listen.

***

Patrick was born in England to a wealthy family. They lived during the time of the Roman Empire when the empire was Christian.

When Patrick was sixteen, raiders came over from Ireland, kidnapped Patrick, took him to Ireland and sold him into slavery. As a slave he worked as a shepherd and found himself lonely most of the time.

***

Didn’t he have any shepherd dogs to keep him company?

I am listening.

***

While he was alone with the sheep he spent his time praying and his Christian faith increased. Then, after six years he had a dream in which he heard the voice of God telling him it was time to leave Ireland. He escaped and had to walk two hundred miles to get on a ship. The crew abandoned ship in France and wandered lost for 28 days, but eventually Patrick found his way home to England.

***

I should have been there with them. I could have sniffed my way home faster than they did.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Patrick had a second vision, telling him to go back to the Irish, but first he attended religious school. When Patrick became an ordained priest he headed for Ireland as a missionary. He spent the rest of his life bringing people in Ireland to Christ. St. Patrick died on March 17th 461. That’s why we celebrate March 17, as St. Patrick’s Day.

***

Hey person. I don’t think you finished the story. What part is it where the leprechauns and the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow come in?

 
10 Comments

Posted by on March 17, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

The Magi

08 Jan
The Magi Journeying

My person says that there are a lot of Nativity scenes that show the wise men bringing gifts to the baby Jesus. She says that these wise men were probably not there at all that first night when Jesus was lying in a manger.

These wise men, called Magi, were probably astrologers. Because they studied the stars they would recognize a new star when it appeared in the sky. They knew what the star meant and came to worship the baby Jesus who was born king of the Jews. The Magi came from the east – maybe from an area which is currently in modern day Iraq.

Okay person, we have Magi and a star – but where are the animals? I’m ready to leave.

My person said to hold on. “Sigh.” She said these Magi were probably rich considering the gifts they brought along for the baby Jesus. They could most likely afford camels for their travels. Well, camels are much bigger than me, but I guess they are still animals.

Those Magi came to Israel riding on their camels and didn’t know exactly where to find Jesus, so they went to King Herod in Jerusalem. King Herod had no clue where to find Jesus, but he was very upset to hear about another king. I guess I might feel the same way if another dog took over my house.

So King Herod had to ask the chief priests and teachers of the law where the Christ was to be born. They told him the prophet Micah had said that the Christ would be born in Bethlehem.

That sneaky King Herod found out from the Magi just when the star had appeared and told them that after they found the Christ child to let him know so he could go worship him.

The Magi went on their way and the star went ahead of them and stopped over the house where Mary and Jesus were. They bowed down and worshipped Jesus and gave him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. Wow Jesus, you got some pretty awesome gifts – but did they give you any chew toys or treats?

 
38 Comments

Posted by on January 8, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , ,

In the Temple

01 Jan
Anna at the presentation of Jesus (right), fro...

“Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother: ‘This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.’” Luke 2:34-35

Okay person, I’m confused. What are these words you put on my blog talking about? Is this about the baby who started out life in a manger? After all, his mother’s name was Mary. These words don’t sound good.

Now I’m really confused. My person said this is the same child, but these words by Simeon will have to wait until later stories. She said that when the baby was eight days old they circumcised him – they what? – my person says “never mind” – and at that time they gave him the name Jesus like the angel had told them to.

My person says they met Simeon when they took Jesus to the temple to consecrate him. Hey person, I haven’t heard about any animals in this story yet. Oh yeah? They what? She says there were animals at the temple that they used for sacrifices. I didn’t know what a sacrifice was so I asked my person and she told me I didn’t want to know. Well whatever it is, I hope they treat those animals nice.

Simeon had the Holy Spirit upon him and was told he would not die before he’d seen the Lord’s Christ. When he saw Jesus in the temple courts he knew he had seen God’s salvation. There was also an old lady named Anna who was a prophetess and she knew who Jesus was too.

Mary must have been pretty upset when Simeon told her about that sword. Maybe she should let Jesus have a pet dog. That dog would protect them.

 
20 Comments

Posted by on January 1, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, dogs

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The Shepherds See

25 Dec

 

Catena - The Adoration of the Shepherds

“I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”        Luke 2:10b – 11

What is it with my person? She keeps putting stuff on my blog that I didn’t write. Is this another Bible story? All I can say is it better be a good one – and the last one had animals, so try to beat that.

Animals and angels? No way! Okay, I’m listening.

My person told me that the night baby Jesus was born there were shepherds in some nearby fields watching their flocks. I bet it was cold and dark out there. Those shepherds must have really loved those sheep to stay out there with them. I wonder if they cuddled up with their sheep dogs to keep warm.

Okay person. You can go on with the story. I was just thinking about those animals. I love the parts with animals. Well, the shepherds were sitting around all cuddled up with their dogs and an angel appeared to them. They were really scared when they saw that angel and the angel had to tell them not to be afraid. Then that angel told the shepherds about the baby that would save them and that the baby would be lying in a manger.

When that angel finished talking a whole bunch of angels appeared and started praising God. When all those angels left, those shepherds must have been looking at each other really funny. “Did you see that?” “Pinch me please.” “Did we all see the same thing?”

Those shepherds decided to go to Bethlehem and check things out for themselves and when they got there they found Mary and Joseph, and there was a baby lying in a manger. I bet it was the first time they saw a baby in a manger – I mean, who would want to put their baby in a trough that animals ate out of?

The shepherds went out to tell everyone they could find what they had seen. They glorified and praised God and people were amazed at their story.

My person says that Mary treasured all these things and pondered them in her heart.

That must have been a special baby. For angels to choose to tell people that hung out with sheep and sheep dogs, and for the baby to be born where animals hang out? What a great way to start out in life.

 

 
20 Comments

Posted by on December 25, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,