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Tag Archives: Christianity

A Busy Day Healing

03 Mar
The life of Jesus of Nazareth plate 47.

The life of Jesus of Nazareth plate 47. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey person, don’t wait for me. I’m still going after the fish Jesus and his disciples left in the boat.

What do you mean, it’s time for another story? That fish story was good enough for me.

He did? Jesus had a busy day in Capernaum? With more miracles?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

On the Sabbath Jesus went to the synagogue in Capernaum and began to teach. And people were amazed at his teaching because he taught with authority.

And while he was teaching, a man possessed by an evil spirit cried out, “What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are – the Holy One of God!”

***

I bet Jesus could just pull out his lightsaber and zap that guy. Doesn’t that evil spirit guy know who Jesus is?

Oh, he does know?

And what do you mean, Jesus doesn’t need a lightsaber? That spoils all the fun.

I am listening.

***

Jesus said sternly, “Be quiet! Come out of him.”

The evil spirit threw the man down before everyone there and came out with a shriek.

***

That’s it? Jesus just says a few words and that evil spirit leaves?

That’s pretty cool, but I still wish he used a lightsaber.

God could rewrite the Bible and add lightsabers to it.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

When Jesus left the synagogue he went with James and John to Simon and Andrew’s house. Simon’s mother-in-law was in bed with a fever so Jesus went to her, took her hand, and helped her up. The fever left her and she began to wait on them.

That evening people brought all kinds of sick and demon possessed to Jesus. Jesus laid his hands on each of the sick and healed them, and drove out many demons, but he wouldn’t let the demons speak because they knew who he was.

***

So Jesus could heal with a few words or a touch but he wouldn’t let the demons speak. I wonder what they would do with their words.

If they try to do anything bad I’m going to give them what for.

Okay, I’ll let you finish the story.

***

That night Jesus went to a place by himself to pray and when his disciples found him they all left to go to the nearby villages. They travelled throughout Galilee. Jesus preached the good news of the kingdom, healed every sickness and disease, and drove out demons.

***

That’s it? No lightsabers, no fish, nothing?

I’ll see you later. I’m going back to that boat with all the fish in it.

 
24 Comments

Posted by on March 3, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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A Fish Story

24 Feb
Jesus and the miraculous catch of fish, in the...

Jesus and the miraculous catch of fish, in the Sea of Galilee, by Raphael (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is it! This is what I’ve been waiting for.

A fish story!

Jesus got into a fishing boat, so there’s gotta be fish around. Right?

Okay, I’ll listen. But can I have some fish treats to munch on while I’m listening?

People eat popcorn at the movies. Shouldn’t dogs be allowed some treats when they hear stories?

***

Jesus was standing by the Sea of Galilee and people were crowding around him and listening to him teach about the word of God. There were two fishing boats there and the fishermen were nearby washing their nets. So Jesus got into the boat belonging to Simon and asked him to put out a little from shore, and he taught the people from the boat.

***

I wish I had been there. I could have gone swimming right up to that boat. Were there any fish in it?

I am listening.

***

When Jesus had finished speaking he told Simon to put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.

But Simon said they’d been working hard all night and hadn’t caught anything.

***

Oh, so there weren’t any fish in that boat. I’m jumping out and swimming back to shore.

***

Because Jesus had told Simon to let down his nets, he did it. And when they did, they caught so many fish that their nets began to break. They had to signal their partners, James and John, to bring their boat over to help them. They filled both boats so full that they began to sink.

***

Guess I’d better swim back and help those boats out now.

I am listening. What did you think I was doing?

***

Simon Peter fell on his knees and said, “Go away from me Lord; I am a sinful man!” because he and his companions were astonished at all the fish they had caught.

But Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Don’t be afraid. From now on you will be fishers of men.”

And they pulled their boats up on shore, left everything and followed Jesus.

***

They left their boats full of fish there? Woo woo! I’m staying with the boats!

 
19 Comments

Posted by on February 24, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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In His Hometown

17 Feb

Jesus reading Scriptures in the Synagogue at NazarethIt’s pretty cool all those miracles Jesus was doing. I bet he was a hero when he finally went back to his hometown. I bet they were all excited for Jesus to do some miracles for them.

Where was it Jesus was from again?

Oh yeah, Nazareth. They probably knew him pretty well there since that’s where he grew up.

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

***

Jesus went to Nazareth and on the Sabbath day…

***

The what day?

Oh, that’s the day they rested and worshiped God?

I guess every day is a Sabbath day for me – at least about the rest part. Naps are good.

I’m listening.

***

On the Sabbath day Jesus went to the synagogue and he stood up to read. The scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. He unrolled it and read,

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,

because he has anointed me

to preach good news to the poor.

He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners

and recovery of sight for the blind,

to release the oppressed,

to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

***

Jesus left out a part. The part about giving extra fish to all the dogs.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus rolled up the scroll and gave it back. He sat down and everyone was looking at him. Then he said, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”

All the people were amazed at what Jesus said, but then they said, “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?”

Jesus knew what the people were thinking and he said, “I tell you the truth. No prophet is accepted in his hometown.”

Jesus didn’t perform any big miracles in Nazareth.

***

I guess they didn’t get any extra fish either.

***

The people in the synagogue became furious at Jesus.

***

I guess they were pretty hungry and really wanted some fish.

***

They took him to the brow of the hill the town was built on and intended to throw him off the cliff. But Jesus walked right through the crowd and went on his way.

Then he went to Capernaum and made his new home there.

***

Did the people in Capernaum get some extra fish?

Hey person, you could give me some fish. You wouldn’t want me moving to Capernaum, would you?

 
19 Comments

Posted by on February 17, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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The Nobleman’s Son

10 Feb
Jesus Christ in Capernaum (study)

Jesus Christ in Capernaum (study) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Jesus went back to where? To Cana? Isn’t that where he turned that water into wine?

Oh no, I’m feeling tipsy already. Can’t Jesus just make some fish juice for me?

Yes, I’ll listen. As soon as you start telling the story.

***

There was a nobleman whose son lay sick and near death in Capernaum. When he heard that Jesus had returned to Galilee from Judea he went and begged Jesus to come and heal his son.

***

Did that nobleman bring a fancy car for Jesus to ride in? Or maybe an airplane?

Oh yeah, I remember you told me they didn’t have cars then. You mean they didn’t have airplanes either?

Yes, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus said to the man, “Unless you people see miraculous signs and wonders you will never believe.”

The nobleman asked Jesus to come before his son died.

***

How long would it take Jesus to walk there?

It was about twenty miles? That’s a long ways. I sure hope that man’s son hangs on. They really should have had an airplane.

I am listening.

***

Jesus told the man that he could go and his son would live. The man took Jesus at his word and left.

***

That man was pretty trusting. How could Jesus know what would happen twenty miles away?

I’ll listen. Just keep telling the story.

***

While the man was still on his way home his servants met him and told him his son was living. When the nobleman asked what time his son got better he learned that it was at the same time that Jesus had said to him, “Your son will live.” So the nobleman and his entire household believed in Jesus.

***

So if Jesus is performing miracles for all these people do you think he will do one for me? I’m still waiting for some fish.

 
17 Comments

Posted by on February 10, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Living Water

03 Feb
The Water of Life Discourse between Jesus and ...

The Water of Life Discourse between Jesus and the Samaritan woman at the well, by Giacomo Franceschini, 17-18th century (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey person, Jesus isn’t going to make any more wine is he? I think I got a hangover from that last story you told me, when he turned water into wine.

Oh, good. Only water in this story, huh? I drink lots of water, so that’s good. Unless maybe, Jesus wants to make me some fish juice.

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

***

Jesus decided to leave Judea, where he’d been hanging out for awhile, and go back to Galilee.

***

Is that a long way? How did he get there? Did he have a fancy car?

Jesus walked? What do you mean they didn’t have cars then? I thought they always had cars.

I’m listening. I just wanted to know.

***

Jesus had to go through Samaria to get where he was going. The Jews hated the Samaritans so much that most of them would travel the extra distance around Samaria rather than go through it.

***

Jesus must have been in a hurry.

Yes, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus came to a town called Sychar in Samaria to the place where Jacob’s well was. His disciples went into town to buy food. Jesus, who was tired from the journey, sat down by the well.

A Samaritan woman came to the well to draw water and Jesus asked her if she’d give him a drink. The woman was surprised that Jesus, a Jewish man, would talk to her, a Samaritan and a woman.

And Jesus said to her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

***

Living water? That sounds good. I want some of that.

I am listening. But could you fill my water bowl with living water next time?

***

The woman couldn’t figure out where Jesus could get any kind of water because he had nothing to draw water out of the well with.

***

I could jump in and get that water. Oops, I forgot. I’d be stuck in the well, wouldn’t I?

***

Jesus told the woman that everyone who drinks from the well will be thirsty again, but those who drink from the water Jesus gives them will never thirst. The water from Jesus will become a spring of water welling up to eternal life.

Of course the woman wanted some of that water so she wouldn’t have to come drawing water from the well every day.

So Jesus told her to get her husband and come back, but when the woman said she had no husband Jesus said she was right. He said she’d had five husbands but the man she was with now wasn’t her husband.

***

That woman was busy. I’ve only had two girlfriends.

Can’t I make a comment sometimes?

***

The woman realized Jesus was a prophet when he knew all about her and she asked him some questions and then said that when the Messiah comes he will explain everything.

Jesus said, “I who speak to you am he.”

***

Jesus is the Messiah? I thought he was just someone who made fish and wine.

***

The woman left her water jar right there and ran back to town to tell everybody about Jesus. Many believed in him because of the woman’s testimony, but after they’d talked Jesus into staying two days with them many believed because of Jesus’ words.

***

Hey person, Jesus words are good, but do you think he’ll throw in some fish with that living water?

 
13 Comments

Posted by on February 3, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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The First Miracle

27 Jan
Jesus making wine from water in The Marriage a...

Jesus making wine from water in The Marriage at Cana, a 14th-century fresco from the Visoki Dečani monastery (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey person, that’s pretty cool that Jesus said, “Follow me” and people followed him. I’ve been trying that all week and I can’t get anyone to follow me. Well, except you that is. Because I hook you to my leash and make you follow me.

I guess Jesus was pretty special. So after he got all those disciples to follow him, what did he do with them?

He took them to a party? No way! I knew there was a reason I wanted to follow Jesus.

Yes, I’ll for sure listen, person. I want to hear about this party.

***

Jesus’ mother was at a wedding in Cana of Galilee and both Jesus and his disciples were invited.

***

If I had been following Jesus back then I could have gone to the party too.

I am listening.

***

While Jesus was at the wedding they ran out of wine.

***

That’s not so bad. I just drink water. They could do that too.

Oh. It was really embarrassing in those days to run out of wine at a wedding? So what did they do?

Jesus mother told Jesus they were out of wine? Why did she do that?

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Jesus told his mother his hour had not yet come, but he did what she wanted anyway.

His mother said to the servants, “Whatever he says to you, do it.”

There were six stone water pots that each contained twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus told the servants to fill them with water and the servants filled them to the brim.

Then Jesus told them to draw some out and take it to the master of the feast.

The master of the feast tasted it and called the bridegroom. He said to the bridegroom, “Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now.”

This was Jesus’ first miraculous sign and because of it his disciples believed in him.

***

Hey person, do you think maybe next time Jesus could turn the water into fish juice instead? I think I drank too much of that special water. I’m feeling kind of tipsy.

 
19 Comments

Posted by on January 27, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Follow the Fish

20 Jan

200px-V&A_-_Raphael,_The_Miraculous_Draught_of_Fishes_(1515)

Hey person, is it true that Jesus went up to people and said “Follow me,” and they followed him? He must have had some pretty good treats with him or something.

What do you mean they left their fish to follow Jesus? How could you leave a good meal to follow anyone?

I’ll try to listen. I’m still thinking about all those fish.

Some of the disciples had been introduced to Jesus when they were hanging out in the wilderness with John the Baptist. John told the disciples that Jesus was the Lamb of God.

They talked with Jesus, but later went back to their homes in Galilee and were busy fishing when Jesus showed up.

Jesus saw Simon, called Peter, and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake. And he said to them, “Come, follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.”

Fishers of men? If those men rubbed fish oil all over themselves I’d go fish for them. And I’d give them lots of big, slobbery kisses.

I’m listening.

Then Jesus walked a little further and he saw James and John in a boat preparing their nets with their father Zebedee. Jesus called James and John and they left their father with the boat and followed Jesus.

I bet they were just tired of working for their dad and wanted to have a good time.

What do you mean they didn’t always have a good time? All those miracles Jesus did? He even turned a little bit of food into enough to feed thousands of people. I bet those disciples always had all they wanted to eat. And good stuff too. Like fish.

Jesus said what?

Anyone who follows Him must deny himself and take up his cross daily?

What does that mean? Does that mean no treats or extra fish?

Oh. It means I have to go where Jesus wants me to go? I guess that’s not so bad. He hung out a lot with fishermen and sometimes he even helped them catch lots of fish – so I guess if I follow Jesus I’m following the fish.

 

 
16 Comments

Posted by on January 20, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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The Real Gift of Christmas

23 Dec

Bongo's presents on top of the fridgeChristmas is almost here and I’m getting really excited. Our tree is up, the lights are on, and I’m looking for the presents. I keep hearing that Santa will bring me presents, but I think I saw my person putting some good smelling things all wrapped in brightly colored paper on top of the fridge.

I’m a pretty good jumper, but I wish I could jump just a little bit higher. All the good stuff that doesn’t go into the fridge seems to go on top of it. If I could get up there I could have a treat feast.

But there’s something else I wish I could do besides jump higher. I wish I could sneak back in time – not too far back, just a little over 2000 years. That’s not asking much, is it?

And I’d like to go to a place called Bethlehem. A little baby was born there one night. Well, I guess lots of babies were born there, but this one was special. This little baby was wrapped in cloths and laid in a manger because the inn was full and his parents had nowhere else to go except for where the animals hung out.

Since there were animals there already I’m sure no one would notice one extra dog in the place. Especially when those shepherds showed up. Everybody would figure I was one of their sheepdogs. Well maybe. I could have pretended I was a sheepdog anyway.

Even if I had to change my appearance so I could pass as a sheepdog, travel back in time, and go to a faraway place, it would be all worth it to see God making his appearance on earth as a baby.

***

Hey person, I think I knocked a ball onto the top of the fridge. Could you get it for me, and maybe knock some of those presents down while you’re at it?

What are you saying, person? The true gift of Christmas is Jesus? That baby in a manger is the gift? Never mind then. I guess Jesus isn’t hanging out on top of the fridge.

***

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

752px-Gerard_van_Honthorst_001

 

 

 

 
20 Comments

Posted by on December 23, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Yeshua is Born

16 Dec
Yeshua

Yeshua (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Okay person, in the last Bible story you told me you said Moses climbed a mountain and died, and Joshua took over. But you weren’t going to tell me any stories about Joshua right now because there’s someone else you want to tell me about who has the same name, but different.

Okay, I’m waiting. Who is this person with the same name – but different?

His name is what? Yeshua? That’s a strange name. I’ve never heard of a name like that before.

And Joshua had a name like it? Wait a minute. Joshua’s name is Joshua.

Person, you are really confusing. Okay, I’ll listen.

Yeshua is a shortened version of Joshua’s Hebrew name Yehoshua? Joshua was sometimes called Yeshua. How come Joshua has so many names?

Because his Hebrew name is translated to his English name when the Bible is translated into English? Okay person, what would his name be in Doglish?

I am listening.

This story is about Yeshua, who was born in Bethlehem to Mary and Joseph, and laid in a manger because there was no room at the inn.

Wait a minute person. You told me this story last year. But it was about Jesus. There can’t be two babies who hung out in mangers.

They were the same baby? Now I’m really confused.

Yeshua is Jesus’ Hebrew name. Then how come we don’t call him Joshua like that other guy.

Because Jesus’ name was translated into Greek first (part of the Bible was written in Greek?) and then into English, so it became Jesus instead of Joshua.

Oh dog, that’s all Greek to me. What would his name be if it was translated again into Doglish?

The name Yeshua means Salvation? I know what it would be in Doglish then.

Dinner.

 
14 Comments

Posted by on December 16, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Climbing the Mountain

09 Dec
Moses shown the Promised Land

Moses shown the Promised Land (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hey person, you’ve been telling me a lot of stories about Moses. Isn’t he getting kind of old by now?

No way! Moses was one hundred twenty years old? How old is that in dog years?

You just don’t want to do the math, do you?

I’m listening.

After Moses lifted up that bronze snake that healed the people who looked at it, he led the Israelites in a few more battles against nations that had come against them.

Did he give them what for?

I am listening. But did Moses give those nations what for?

Woo woo! My person says he did give them what for. But then God told Moses what? That he would be gathered to his people? What does that mean?

Oh. God told Moses he was going to die. That wasn’t a very nice thing to say to Moses.

Okay, I’ll listen but this is getting sad.

Moses appointed Joshua son of Nun to take his place as leader and lead the people into the Promised Land.

Then God told Moses to climb to the top of Mount Nebo where he could see all of the Promised Land. He told Moses that he would die on top of the mountain and be gathered to his people.

Why didn’t Moses just not climb the mountain then?

Moses was obedient to God? I’m not always obedient to you person. You aren’t going to make me climb up a mountain are you? I’m not going.

God told Moses he couldn’t go into the Promised Land because he had not upheld God’s holiness among the Israelites at the waters of Meribah Kadesh in the desert of Zin. That was when Moses struck the rock instead of speaking to it like God had told him to do.

I guess Moses didn’t want to disobey God twice, but that would be pretty scary climbing up that mountain.

After Moses saw the Promised Land from the top of the mountain he died. God buried him in Moab, in the valley opposite Beth Peor, but nobody knows where the grave is.

And Joshua took over as leader of Israel and the Israelites had some awesome adventures.

I’m sticking with Joshua and maybe get to watch some walls fall over. I heard that Jericho doesn’t have a chance.

What? Oh yeah, it’s almost Christmas. It’s hard to remember that when we have sunshine instead of snow. What does that have to do with Joshua?

You mean I have to wait to hear stories about Joshua? That’s okay. I can’t wait for my treats and toys. I’ll have lots of stories about my new presents.

What do you mean, Christmas isn’t about snow, treats, or toys? What else is there?

Now I’m totally confused. You mean Christmas is about someone who had the same name as Joshua, but it was different? I don’t get it.

Oh, in English – you mean Doglish I’m sure – the names are different but they mean the same thing. I’m still confused.

You’re going to make me wait to find out? This is almost as hard as waiting for my presents.

***

P.S. A new friend, Molly the Wally, shared one of my posts today. You can check it out by clicking here.

 
12 Comments

Posted by on December 9, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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