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Peter Does It

Masolino da Panicale [Public domain or Public domain], via Wikimedia CommonsWait a minute.

Last week Saul turned into a basket case and now you’re telling me Peter’s doing miracles like Jesus did?

What happened to the basket case?

The disciples in Jerusalem were afraid of him and the Grecian Jews wanted to kill him so the disciples who had stopped being afraid of him sent him to Tarsus?

Okay.

So what did Peter do?

***

As Peter traveled about the country, he went to visit the saints in Lydda. There he found a man named Aeneas, a paralytic who had been bedridden for eight years. “Aeneas, Peter said to him, “Jesus Christ heals you. Get up and take care of your mat.” Immediately Aeneas got up.

***

Is it that simple?

All you have to do is say, “Jesus Christ heals you,” and they’re healed?

What do you mean, I can’t say that.

I can too talk—“Woof, woof woof.”

Doesn’t that sound like what Peter said?

I am listening.

***

All those who lived in Lydda and Sharon saw him and turned to the Lord.

***

What if someone pretended to be paralyzed and get healed?

Would that work?

What do you mean, not in a small town?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

In Joppa there was a disciple named Tabitha (which when translated, is Dorcas) who was always doing good and helping the poor.

***

I do good.

Why are you laughing person?

I’m always listening.

***

About that time she became sick and died, and her body was washed and placed in an upstairs room. Lydda was near Joppa; so when the disciples heard that Peter was in Lydda, they sent two men to him and urged him, “Please come at once!”

***

I wonder if they offered Peter treats to come.

I’d come for treats.

***

Peter went with them, and when he arrived he was taken upstairs to the room. All the widows stood around him, crying and showing him the robes and other clothing that Dorcas had made while she was still with them.

***

As long as they don’t make me wear any of those clothes.

I’m listening. I’m listening.

***

Peter sent them all out of the room; then he got down on his knees and prayed. Turning toward the dead woman, he said, “Tabitha, get up.” She opened her eyes, and seeing Peter she sat up.

***

Boy was she obedient.

I hope Peter gave her some treats.

***

Peter took her by the hand and helped her to her feet. The he called the believers and the widows and presented her to them alive. This became known all over Joppa and many people believed in the Lord. Peter stayed in Joppa for some time with a tanner named Simon.

***

So, if I bring someone back from the dead and many people believe in the Lord because of it, will Jesus give me treats?

 
8 Comments

Posted by on October 5, 2014 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Begging for Treats

http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File%3ASaint_Pierre_et_saint_Jean_gu%C3%A9rissant_le_boiteux_-_Poussin_-_Metropolitan.jpgI’m still confused about all those different languages the people were speaking in the last story you told me.

Which people were speaking to the dogs?

The church grew after that day?

So I’m wondering – how many dogs joined the church?

Yes, I’m listening. I’m listening.

***

One day Peter and John were going up to the temple at the time of prayer – at three in the afternoon.

***

I thought you said a bunch of people joined the church.

Didn’t they have a great big church building by now?

Why were they going to the temple?

What do you mean, the church isn’t a building?

The church is people?

And dogs too. Right?

I am listening.

***

Now a man crippled from birth was being carried to the temple gate called Beautiful, where he was put every day to beg from those going into the temple courts.

***

Did people give him treats?

That’s what I beg for.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

When he saw Peter and John about to enter, he asked them for money.

***

What good is money?

You can’t eat it.

***

Peter looked straight at him, as did John.

***

I hate it when people do that.

***

Then Peter said, “Look at us!” So the man gave them his attention, expecting to get something from them.

Then Peter said, “Silver and gold I do not have, but what I have I give you.

***

Oh good. Peter must be giving him treats.

***

Peter said, “In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.”

***

Oh, I get it.

Peter wants to take him for a walk.

Walks are good.

I’m listening, but I think I’ll follow them on their walk.

***

Taking him by the right hand, Peter helped him up, and instantly the man’s feet and ankles became strong. He jumped to his feet and began to walk. Then he went with them into the temple courts, walking and jumping, and praising God.

***

That man sounds like he’s fun to go on a walk with.

I bet he’d play with me too.

***

When all the people saw him walking and praising God, they recognized him as the same man who used to sit begging at the temple gate called Beautiful, and they were filled with wonder and amazement at what had happened to him.

***

If that man isn’t begging anymore, will people still give him treats?

 
10 Comments

Posted by on June 22, 2014 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Healing

Bongo next to a healing prickly pear cactusI’ve got some good news to share with you.

You see, a little over a year ago there was some serious mischief on my trails.

A crime actually.

Someone had murdered some of my prickly pear cacti.

If you want to know how terrible this crime was you can click on this link here.

Ever since then I’ve been sad every time I walk by and see them.

But those prickly pear are hardy.

And they’re beginning to show signs of healing.

They must have only been almost murdered.

How do I know?

.

Because dead cacti don’t grow flowers.

Damaged prickly pear cactus with blossoms

It’s like a miracle on my trails.

And things have gotten even better.

The injured prickly pear keep getting more flowers.

Damaged prickly pear with blossoms

But please be careful around these prickly pear.

If you tell them they still look ugly…

they might shed a few flowers.

 
26 Comments

Posted by on May 31, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Untied

Jesus healing the crippled womanI’m done with Bible stories. Last week you told me I was going to get into trouble for the mischief that happens around here when you’re not home.

You’ve got to believe me. It’s Scratchy that does it.

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

***

On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years.

***

Bring that woman to me. I’ll give that spirit what for.

What do you mean, I can’t give a spirit what for? I bet I can.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The woman was bent over and could not straighten up at all.

***

Maybe I could bark at her and scare her straight. You know, kind of like when you scare the hiccups out of someone.

I am listening.

***

When Jesus saw the woman, he called her forward and said to her, “Woman, you are set free from your infirmity.” Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God.

***

Is that all it took? I could have put my paws on her.

***

Indignant because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath, the synagogue ruler said to the people, “There are six days for work. So come and be healed on those days, not on the Sabbath.”

The Lord answered him, “You hypocrites!”

***

You tell them, Jesus.

I’m listening. I’m just getting involved in the story.

***

Jesus continued, “Doesn’t each of you on the Sabbath untie his ox or donkey from the stall and lead it out to give it water? Then should not this woman, a daughter of Abraham, whom Satan has kept bound for eighteen long years, be set free on the Sabbath day from what bound her?”

***

That woman was tied up? Did somebody have to take her out on a leash too?

I guess that’s kind of like you, person. I have to take you out on a leash.

***

When Jesus said these things, all his opponents were humiliated, but the people were delighted with all the wonderful things he was doing.

***

That was really nice of Jesus to untie that woman and let her go on walks without a leash, but I’m not going to let you off your leash, person.

I’m afraid you might wander off.

 
13 Comments

Posted by on October 20, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, dogs, humor

 

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I was Blind

Jesus healing a blind manJesus did more miracles? He’s just full of miracles, isn’t he?

I hope he does another food miracle. I’m getting hungry.

No food this time? I need a cookie before we start then.

On second thought, I need a bunch of cookies.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus saw a man who had been blind from birth. The Jews of Jesus’ day believed that physical problems were caused by sin and Jesus’ disciples asked Him if it had been the man or his parents who had sinned.

***

I guess that’s why I have perfect health. I’m such a perfect dog.

Being scared of thunder doesn’t count.

***

Jesus said that neither had sinned. The man was blind so the work of God might be displayed in his life.

Having said this, Jesus spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes.

***

I could do that with a slobbery kiss on that man’s eyes.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

“Go,” Jesus told the man, “wash in the pool of Siloam.” So the man went and washed, and came home seeing.

***

I guess my slobbery kisses never made anyone see. Maybe I forgot the part about having to wash the slobber out again.

***

The man’s neighbors who had seen him begging in the past weren’t sure if it was him, but he assured them he was the same man who had been blind.

“How then were your eyes opened?” the neighbors demanded.

The man told them what had happened and that it was Jesus who had healed him. Then the neighbors took the man to the Pharisees who questioned him again.

***

It might have been a lot easier for that man if he had just put everything on Facebook.

I am too listening.

***

The day that Jesus had healed the man was a Sabbath so some of the Pharisees said, “This man is not from God, for he does not keep the Sabbath.”

But others asked, “How can a sinner do such miraculous signs?”

Finally they turned to the blind man who had been healed and asked him what he thought? The man replied, “He is a prophet.”

***

That’s telling them!

***

The Jews still didn’t believe the man had been blind and received his sight so they talked to his parents. The parents were afraid the Jews would throw them out of the synagogue because they had threatened to do that to anyone who acknowledged that Jesus was the Christ, so they said they didn’t know how their son had been healed and to ask him.

So the Jews called the man who had been blind a second time and said, “Give glory to God. We know this man Jesus is a sinner.”

The man replied, “Whether He is a sinner or not, I don’t know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see.”

***

I think that guy wrote a famous song.

I’ll listen, but can I bark along?

***

The Jews asked the man again how Jesus had healed him, and the man answered, “I have told you already and you did not listen. Why do you want to hear it again? Do you want to become His disciples too?”

This made the Jews really mad and they hurled insults at him saying they were disciples of Moses and they didn’t even know where Jesus came from.

***

I know where Jesus came from. Can I go tell them?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The man answered the Jews, “Now that is remarkable! You don’t know where He comes from, yet He opened my eyes. We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly man who does His will. Nobody has ever heard of opening the eyes a man born blind. If this man were not from God, he could do nothing.”

***

That’s telling them.

***

The Pharisees said, “How dare you lecture us!” and threw the man out.

Jesus found the man, told the man who He is and then said, “For judgment I have come into this world, so that the blind will see and those who see will become blind.”

Some Pharisees heard Jesus say this and said, “What? Are we blind too?”

Jesus said, “If you were blind, you would not be guilty of sin; but now you claim you can see, your guilt remains.”

***

My eyes are shut. I can’t see a thing.

Oh, wait. This is terrible. I don’t think I can do this.

Do I have to walk around with my eyes closed until Jesus comes back?

That’s going to be a long nap.

 
12 Comments

Posted by on August 25, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Miracle within a Miracle

English: Raising of Jairus' Daughter by Wassil...

English: Raising of Jairus’ Daughter by Wassilij Dimitriewitsch Polenow. Stamp of Russia, 2000, a commemorative issue for 2000th Anniversary of the Birth of Jesus Русский: 2000-летие Рождества Христова. Почтовая марка России 2000 года (серия из 4 марок и одного блока). Изображена картина Поленова «Воскрешение дочери Иаира» (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Jesus sure has been busy. He calmed a storm and sent a bunch of demons out of a man into a herd of pigs all in one day. I bet he’s going to go home and take a nap now.

What, no nap?

Oh yeah, I forgot. He already took a nap. In the boat while that storm was going on.

So what’s Jesus gonna do now?

***

Jesus went by boat back to the other side of the lake, to Capernaum. When he returned a large crowd welcomed him.

***

I bet that crowd was worried about the pigs that jumped into the water.

What? They didn’t care about those pigs? All that bacon?

Jesus’ people didn’t eat pigs? Well, at least they ate fish.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

While Jesus was by the lake a synagogue ruler named Jairus came and fell at Jesus’ feet. Jairus told Jesus that his little daughter was dying and he pleaded with Jesus to come heal her. So Jesus went with Jairus.

A large crowd followed Jesus and pressed around him, and a woman who had been bleeding for twelve years and had spent all her money on doctors who couldn’t heal her, came up behind Jesus and touched his cloak. She thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.”

***

Does Jesus have magic clothes, too?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The woman’s bleeding stopped when she touched Jesus’ cloak and Jesus realized that power had gone out from him. He turned around and asked, “Who touched my clothes?”

The disciples told Jesus that the crowd was all around him, but Jesus kept looking around.

And the woman came and fell at his feet, and trembling with fear, she told him the truth.

Jesus said to her,”Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.”

***

So if I have faith that I will get fish, will I get some?

I am listening.

***

While Jesus was still speaking some men came from Jairus’ house and told him his daughter was dead and he didn’t need to bother Jesus any more.

But Jesus said, “Don’t be afraid; just believe.”

Jesus would only let Peter, James, and John follow him and when they got to the house people were crying and wailing loudly.

***

I bet Jesus would have let me come too. I can wail really well.

I’m listening.

***

Jesus told them to stop wailing and said, “The child is not dead but asleep.”

All the people there laughed at him.

***

I bet if Jesus gave them some fish they’d stop laughing.

***

Jesus took the child’s father and mother and the three disciples with him to where the little girl was. He took her by the hand and said, “My child, get up!”

The little girl immediately stood up and Jesus gave orders not to let anyone know about this and told them to give her something to eat.

***

I bet that little girl isn’t very hungry yet. She’ll probably share some of her food with me.

 
12 Comments

Posted by on June 2, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Still Looking for the Fish

Jesus healing at the Pool of Bethesda

Another feast!? Jesus is going to a feast?

I hope I get invited. There’s good food at those feasts.

What do you mean, this story isn’t about the feast? What else could be better than a feast?

Oh. Another miracle, huh? You mean like when Jesus fed all those people?

What do you mean, those weren’t the only miracles Jesus did?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

When Jesus was in Jerusalem for a feast he stopped by a pool called Bethesda. A great number of disabled people hung out there. An angel went down at a certain time and stirred up the water and whoever stepped in first after that was healed.

***

That sounds like a good place to go swimming.

What do you mean dogs probably weren’t allowed in that pool?

I am listening.

***

One of the people at the pool had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. Jesus saw him lying there and learned he’d been in that condition for a long time and he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”

The invalid told Jesus that he had no one to help him into the pool, so when the water was stirred someone always beat him into it.

Jesus said to the man, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.”

The man was immediately made well and he picked up his mat and walked.

***

I bet that man was so happy he ran out and got some fish. And he had so much he shared it with me.

I am not totally focused on fish. Any kind of food will do.

I am listening, but I just had to throw in that fish part.

***

The Jews saw the healed man carrying his mat and they gave him what for because it was the Sabbath and it was against the law to carry a mat on the Sabbath.

But it was one of the laws that people had added to God’s laws.

***

So if people make a law we shouldn’t have to follow it? Like I shouldn’t have to be on a leash?

What do you mean that’s not the same?

***

Jesus was making a point because so many things had been added to the Sabbath that it was impossible to follow them.

But because Jesus was healing on the Sabbath the Jews persecuted him.

***

Does that mean Jesus can’t feed everybody on the Sabbath? I’d better hang out with him on the other days of the week.

 

 
21 Comments

Posted by on April 21, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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