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Tag Archives: Jesus

Still Looking for the Fish

21 Apr

Another feast!? Jesus is going to a feast?

I hope I get invited. There’s good food at those feasts.

What do you mean, this story isn’t about the feast? What else could be better than a feast?

Oh. Another miracle, huh? You mean like when Jesus fed all those people?

What do you mean, those weren’t the only miracles Jesus did?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

When Jesus was in Jerusalem for a feast he stopped by a pool called Bethesda. A great number of disabled people hung out there. An angel went down at a certain time and stirred up the water and whoever stepped in first after that was healed.

***

That sounds like a good place to go swimming.

What do you mean dogs probably weren’t allowed in that pool?

I am listening.

***

One of the people at the pool had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. Jesus saw him lying there and learned he’d been in that condition for a long time and he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”

The invalid told Jesus that he had no one to help him into the pool, so when the water was stirred someone always beat him into it.

Jesus said to the man, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.”

The man was immediately made well and he picked up his mat and walked.

***

I bet that man was so happy he ran out and got some fish. And he had so much he shared it with me.

I am not totally focused on fish. Any kind of food will do.

I am listening, but I just had to throw in that fish part.

***

The Jews saw the healed man carrying his mat and they gave him what for because it was the Sabbath and it was against the law to carry a mat on the Sabbath.

But it was one of the laws that people had added to God’s laws.

***

So if people make a law we shouldn’t have to follow it? Like I shouldn’t have to be on a leash?

What do you mean that’s not the same?

***

Jesus was making a point because so many things had been added to the Sabbath that it was impossible to follow them.

But because Jesus was healing on the Sabbath the Jews persecuted him.

***

Does that mean Jesus can’t feed everybody on the Sabbath? I’d better hang out with him on the other days of the week.

21 Comments

Posted by Bongo on April 21, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Christianity, dogs, faith, God, healing, Jerusalem, Jesus, Jews, Pets, Sabbath

Follow Me

14 Apr

Hey person, did Jesus ever get that hole in the roof fixed after he healed that guy who couldn’t walk?

What? The Bible doesn’t say anything about it? How am I supposed to sleep at night if I’m worried if there’s still a hole in the roof or not?

Jesus did what?

He signed up another disciple? Didn’t he have enough already?

Did this new disciple catch a lot of fish too?

I’ll listen if there’s fish.

There’s food in the story? Okay, I’ll listen.

***

In Jesus’ day the Israelites hated the Roman government that ruled over them because the Roman’s were very oppressive. They also hated the tax collectors because they were collecting taxes for the Roman government. These tax collectors were Jews who not only worked for the Roman government, but usually collected more tax than required and kept the extra for themselves.

***

What does that have to do with food?

The food is coming?

I’ll listen then.

***

Jesus saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth and he said to him, “Follow me.”

***

Why would Jesus want someone nobody liked on his team? Wouldn’t that put him at a disadvantage?

***

The food’s almost here?

I’ll listen then.

***

Matthew got up and followed Jesus and then invited Jesus to dinner at his house.

***

Do you think Matthew would invite me too?

I’ll listen, but do you mind if I drool while I’m listening?

I can’t help it if I drool, but if you give me a treat I might stop.

***

Matthew also invited a bunch of tax collectors and “sinners” to have dinner with them. Some of the religious people called Pharisees saw this and asked Jesus’ disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and ‘sinners’?”

***

I’d eat with them too as long as they shared their food – and gave me loves.

I am listening.

***

Jesus heard the Pharisee’s question and said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”

***

Does that mean that Jesus still loves me even when I’m getting into mischief?

Woo woo! Jesus loves me! I hope he’ll bring me some fish.

18 Comments

Posted by Bongo on April 14, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Christianity, Disciple (Christianity), dogs, Jesus, Matthew, Pets, Pharisee, Tax collector

A Hole in the Roof

07 Apr

You’re what, person? Now that you told me about Jesus being raised from the dead that’s the end of the story, isn’t it?

It isn’t?

But you’re not going to tell it to me now? You mean I don’t get a Bible story this week?

You’re going to what? Tell me about more of Jesus’ miracles from before he died and rose again?

I like miracles.

***

Jesus had been traveling around Galilee and when he returned to his home in Capernaum so many people came that his whole house was full and even outside the door there was no room left.

Jesus preached to all those people.

***

Did he preach about how they could get more fish?

I was just asking.

***

While Jesus was preaching, four men came carrying a paralytic on a mat.

***

A what?

You mean he can’t move? Poor guy. At least that leper that Jesus healed could leap.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

The house was so crowded that the men couldn’t get the paralyzed man anywhere near Jesus. So they got up on the roof and made an opening in the roof above Jesus.

After digging through, they lowered the man on his mat into the middle of the crowd, right in front of Jesus.

***

Wasn’t Jesus mad about the hole in the roof? What if it rained?

I’m listening.

***

Jesus saw the faith of the four men and said to the paralytic, “Friend, your sins are forgiven.”

***

If I jump through a hole in the roof and land at Jesus’ feet will he forgive my sins? Oh, I forgot. I don’t do anything wrong. It’s always Scratchy.

I am listening.

***

There were some teachers of the law in the crowd who were pretty upset when Jesus forgave the man’s sins because only God can forgive sins. But Jesus knew what they were thinking so He said to them, “Which is easier: to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up, take your mat and walk’?”

Then Jesus said to the paralyzed man, “I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home.”

The man stood up, took his mat, and went home praising God.

***

Jesus told those teachers of the law a thing or two, didn’t he?

But there’s still one thing I want to know.

Who’s going to fix that hole in the roof?

14 Comments

Posted by Bongo on April 7, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Capernaum, Christianity, dogs, Galilee, healing, Jesus, paralytic, Pets, Sin

The Empty Tomb

31 Mar

That is not the same tomb that I ate a few days ago. That one was made of squishy newspaper and chicken wire.

I would never eat a rock. Who do you think I am, anyway?

This is supposed to be the tomb they buried Jesus in? Why would they bury him in a rock?

Yeah, I guess it would be hard to steal him out of a big, rock tomb when a humongous rock covered the entrance.

But who would want to? Why would anyone want to steal a body?

Jesus what? He told people he would be killed and after three days he would rise again?

So the elders, chief priests and scribes wanted to seal Jesus in so his disciples couldn’t steal his body and say he had risen?

But what if Jesus was telling the truth? Wouldn’t He be stuck inside that big rock tomb? What would He do then?

Okay, I’ll listen to the rest of the story.

***

Jesus died on the cross on a Friday, and on Sunday Mary Magdalene and some of the other women who had followed Him went to His tomb. They found the stone rolled back from the door of the tomb.

***

So Jesus snuck out right through the front door.

I am listening.

***

Mary Magdalene ran to tell Peter and John, two of Jesus’ disciples, that they didn’t know where Jesus’ body had been taken. Peter and John ran to the tomb and only found the linen cloths that Jesus had been buried in. So they left and went back to their homes.

***

Does that mean Jesus had to go and knock on their doors?

I’m listening. I just wanted to know.

***

When Peter and John left, Mary stayed behind weeping. She looked into the tomb and saw two angels in there. The angels asked her why she was weeping and Mary said, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.

After she said this, Mary turned around and saw Jesus, but she thought He was the gardener. She said to Him, “Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where you have laid Him, and I will take Him away.”

Jesus said to her, “Mary!”

Mary finally realized this was Jesus and was overjoyed.

***

Did Jesus look for a place to hide after that so he wouldn’t be killed again?

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Later, when the disciples were hiding behind locked doors for fear of the Jews, Jesus appeared to them.

***

He went right through the locked door? Does that mean He could have gotten out of that tomb even if the door wasn’t rolled away?

That would make it easy for Him to hide so he wouldn’t be killed again.

***

Jesus won’t be killed again. God raised Him from the dead so that He will have everlasting life. And you can have everlasting life too if you declare Jesus as Lord and believe that God raised Him from the dead.

***

I’ve just got one question.

Can you make the next empty tomb out of bread please?

24 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 31, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Christianity, dogs, Easter, God, Jesus, Lord, Mary Magdalene, Peter, Pets, resurrection

The Tomb is Really Empty Now

25 Mar

Hey person, Scratchy’s getting into the Easter eggs.

What?

I am not.

I am not trying to cover up for what I did.

What did I do?

Oh that. Well, it smelled like food to me.

So I ate it.

It was a what?

You’re making an empty tomb for Easter? The tomb that Jesus left?

Aren’t tombs made out of rocks or something?

Person, if you’d carved that tomb out of rock I wouldn’t have eaten it. So it’s all your fault.

But don’t worry. I’ll take care of it.

Look.

I’m cleaning up the mess I made on the floor.

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

31 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 25, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Easter, Easter egg, Empty tomb, Jesus, mischief, paper mache, Pets, Tomb

Feet and Bread

24 Mar

English: The Last Supper (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today is the beginning of what week?

Holy week? I haven’t been digging any holes lately.

Maybe it’s all those ant holes that I’ve seen popping up lately.

What do you mean it’s not that kind of holes? What other kind of holes are there?

Okay, I’m listening.

Today is Palm Sunday and I told the story of that last year?

I did?

Oh yeah. That’s when Jesus came riding on a donkey and everybody waved palm branches and shouted Hosanna.

But you said it’s a whole week. Did Jesus ride on a donkey all week?

I am letting you tell the story. I’m just asking questions to get you going.

***

Jesus shared the Passover meal with his disciples later in the week.

***

Food? This story is about food? I’m all ears!

***

In those days the people wore sandals and their feet would get very dirty on the dusty roads, so the lowliest servant would normally wash the feet of those sitting down for a meal. But this time Jesus got up, wrapped a towel around his waist, and began washing the disciple’s feet.

***

Why would Jesus wash their feet? Shouldn’t somebody be washing His feet?

***

That’s what Peter thought and he said to Jesus, “You shall never wash my feet.”

***

That means there’s extra water left in that foot washing bowl. I bet dirty foot water tastes good.

I am listening.

***

Jesus told Peter that unless He washed him, he would have no part with Jesus.

And when Jesus had finished washing the disciple’s feet He told them to do for each other what He had done for them.

***

I’ll lick the disciple’s feet any time. I bet those feet smell really good.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

While they were eating, Jesus told the disciples that one of them would betray Him. The disciples didn’t know what He meant and one by one they said, “Surely not I?”

Jesus said, “It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread to when I have dipped it in the dish.” He dipped the bread and gave it to Judas Iscariot.

As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him.

Jesus told Judas, “What you are about to do, do quickly.”

Judas left, but the rest of the disciples had no idea what he was doing.

***

I can’t figure Judas out. Why would he leave before they were done eating?

He was going to what? Betray Jesus? But couldn’t he have done that after dinner?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

While they were eating Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to the disciples, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.

And after supper He took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to the disciples, and said, “This is my blood of the new covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.”

***

You aren’t stopping now, are you person? I want to hear the rest of the story.

What do you mean I’d fall asleep if you talked too long?

No I wouldn’t. I’m just waiting for Jesus and the disciples to leave. I want to see if they left any food behind.

19 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 24, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Christianity, dogs, Holy Week, Jesus, Judas Iscariot, Last Supper, Passover, Peter, Pets, Satan

Leaping Away

10 Mar

Christ cleansing a leper by Jean-Marie Melchior Doze, 1864

Wait a minute, person. I’m almost finished with all that fish in the boat.

I had to work really hard to eat all that. It took me two weeks. There were a lot of fish.

Okay, I’m ready for another story now. Maybe about some water so I can wash all those fish down.

What? No water? You’re telling me a story about a man who leapt around all day?

He leaped everywhere and couldn’t stop leaping so he asked Jesus to heal him?

I leap around a lot too, but I don’t want Jesus to heal me. Leaping is fun.

Oh. The man didn’t leap, he had leprosy? What kind of a thing is that? It sounds like leaping to me.

***

The man had a really bad skin disease called leprosy. In Jesus’ day people with this disease had to stay far away from other people and if anyone started coming near to them they had to shout, “Unclean, unclean.”

***

Couldn’t they take a bath so they were clean again?

I’m listening.

***

Their disease was what made them unclean. People were afraid to touch them because they were concerned that they might get the disease too.

This man came and knelt before Jesus and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.”

Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man.

***

Jesus touched him? I thought you said you couldn’t touch those people because you might get that leaping disease.

I am too listening.

***

Jesus said, “I am willing. Be clean!”

Immediately the leprosy left the man and he was healed.

***

Could that man still leap if he wanted to?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus told the man not to tell anyone, but to show himself to the priest. In those days lepers went to the priest when they were healed and the priest was the one who declared them clean.

But the man leaped around and told everyone what Jesus had done for him. Crowds of people came to have Jesus heal them and Jesus often had to withdraw into lonely places in order to pray.

***

Do you think any of those people who came to be healed brought any fish with them?

I know I ate a lot of fish. But I’m going to need some more tomorrow.

12 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 10, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Christianity, Disease, dogs, Fish, Jesus, Leprosy, Lord, Pets, Religion and Spirituality

A Fish Story

24 Feb

Jesus and the miraculous catch of fish, in the Sea of Galilee, by Raphael (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This is it! This is what I’ve been waiting for.

A fish story!

Jesus got into a fishing boat, so there’s gotta be fish around. Right?

Okay, I’ll listen. But can I have some fish treats to munch on while I’m listening?

People eat popcorn at the movies. Shouldn’t dogs be allowed some treats when they hear stories?

***

Jesus was standing by the Sea of Galilee and people were crowding around him and listening to him teach about the word of God. There were two fishing boats there and the fishermen were nearby washing their nets. So Jesus got into the boat belonging to Simon and asked him to put out a little from shore, and he taught the people from the boat.

***

I wish I had been there. I could have gone swimming right up to that boat. Were there any fish in it?

I am listening.

***

When Jesus had finished speaking he told Simon to put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.

But Simon said they’d been working hard all night and hadn’t caught anything.

***

Oh, so there weren’t any fish in that boat. I’m jumping out and swimming back to shore.

***

Because Jesus had told Simon to let down his nets, he did it. And when they did, they caught so many fish that their nets began to break. They had to signal their partners, James and John, to bring their boat over to help them. They filled both boats so full that they began to sink.

***

Guess I’d better swim back and help those boats out now.

I am listening. What did you think I was doing?

***

Simon Peter fell on his knees and said, “Go away from me Lord; I am a sinful man!” because he and his companions were astonished at all the fish they had caught.

But Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Don’t be afraid. From now on you will be fishers of men.”

And they pulled their boats up on shore, left everything and followed Jesus.

***

They left their boats full of fish there? Woo woo! I’m staying with the boats!

19 Comments

Posted by Bongo on February 24, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Boat, Christianity, dogs, faith, Fish, Jesus, Pets, Sea of Galilee

In His Hometown

17 Feb

It’s pretty cool all those miracles Jesus was doing. I bet he was a hero when he finally went back to his hometown. I bet they were all excited for Jesus to do some miracles for them.

Where was it Jesus was from again?

Oh yeah, Nazareth. They probably knew him pretty well there since that’s where he grew up.

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

***

Jesus went to Nazareth and on the Sabbath day…

***

The what day?

Oh, that’s the day they rested and worshiped God?

I guess every day is a Sabbath day for me – at least about the rest part. Naps are good.

I’m listening.

***

On the Sabbath day Jesus went to the synagogue and he stood up to read. The scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. He unrolled it and read,

“The Spirit of the Lord is on me,

because he has anointed me

to preach good news to the poor.

He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners

and recovery of sight for the blind,

to release the oppressed,

to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

***

Jesus left out a part. The part about giving extra fish to all the dogs.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus rolled up the scroll and gave it back. He sat down and everyone was looking at him. Then he said, “Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.”

All the people were amazed at what Jesus said, but then they said, “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?”

Jesus knew what the people were thinking and he said, “I tell you the truth. No prophet is accepted in his hometown.”

Jesus didn’t perform any big miracles in Nazareth.

***

I guess they didn’t get any extra fish either.

***

The people in the synagogue became furious at Jesus.

***

I guess they were pretty hungry and really wanted some fish.

***

They took him to the brow of the hill the town was built on and intended to throw him off the cliff. But Jesus walked right through the crowd and went on his way.

Then he went to Capernaum and made his new home there.

***

Did the people in Capernaum get some extra fish?

Hey person, you could give me some fish. You wouldn’t want me moving to Capernaum, would you?

19 Comments

Posted by Bongo on February 17, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Capernaum, Christianity, dogs, faith, God, Isaiah, Jesus, Nazareth, Pets, Sabbath

The Nobleman’s Son

10 Feb

Jesus Christ in Capernaum (study) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Jesus went back to where? To Cana? Isn’t that where he turned that water into wine?

Oh no, I’m feeling tipsy already. Can’t Jesus just make some fish juice for me?

Yes, I’ll listen. As soon as you start telling the story.

***

There was a nobleman whose son lay sick and near death in Capernaum. When he heard that Jesus had returned to Galilee from Judea he went and begged Jesus to come and heal his son.

***

Did that nobleman bring a fancy car for Jesus to ride in? Or maybe an airplane?

Oh yeah, I remember you told me they didn’t have cars then. You mean they didn’t have airplanes either?

Yes, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus said to the man, “Unless you people see miraculous signs and wonders you will never believe.”

The nobleman asked Jesus to come before his son died.

***

How long would it take Jesus to walk there?

It was about twenty miles? That’s a long ways. I sure hope that man’s son hangs on. They really should have had an airplane.

I am listening.

***

Jesus told the man that he could go and his son would live. The man took Jesus at his word and left.

***

That man was pretty trusting. How could Jesus know what would happen twenty miles away?

I’ll listen. Just keep telling the story.

***

While the man was still on his way home his servants met him and told him his son was living. When the nobleman asked what time his son got better he learned that it was at the same time that Jesus had said to him, “Your son will live.” So the nobleman and his entire household believed in Jesus.

***

So if Jesus is performing miracles for all these people do you think he will do one for me? I’m still waiting for some fish.

17 Comments

Posted by Bongo on February 10, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Cana, Capernaum, Christianity, dogs, faith, Galilee, Jesus, Pets, Religion and Spirituality