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Listen to the Story

My person said I have to stay really quiet and listen because the Easter story is very important. I’ll try, person.

My person says that Jesus was crucified on the cross. That must have hurt.

Yes, I’m listening, person. I still don’t get why he was crucified though.

So God can’t look on sin and we all have it? Even me? Not me.

Well yeah, I do that but… I do that too, but it’s not my fault.

Jesus is the only one qualified to take all our sins upon himself and he had to die on the cross to do it? So God can look at us because Jesus took our sin for us? It’s a free gift from him?

We have to do what? Ask for that free gift? That’s all? That sounds really simple.

So what does that have to do with Easter?

Jesus didn’t stay dead? How could that happen?

My person says that after Jesus died he was buried in a tomb and a very large stone was rolled in front of it. On Sunday morning Mary Magdalene and some other women went to the tomb. They didn’t know how they would move the stone, but when they got there they found it had already been rolled away.

Mary ran to Peter and John, two of Jesus’ disciples, and told them someone had taken Jesus and they didn’t know where he was.

Peter and John ran to the tomb and found nothing inside but the linen and burial cloth that had been wrapped around Jesus. They didn’t understand what was happening and they went home.

Mary Magdalene stayed there and stood outside the tomb crying. She looked into the tomb and saw two angels sitting where Jesus had been.

Person, you didn’t tell me there were angels in the story.

I’m really listening, person.

The angels asked Mary why she was crying and she said they had taken her Lord away and she didn’t know where they had put him.

Mary turned around and saw a man standing there. She thought it was the gardener.

A gardener? Does he grow good stuff to eat?

I’m sorry person. I couldn’t help myself. You made me think about food.

Okay. The man asked Mary why she was crying and who she was looking for.

Mary said to the man that if he had carried Jesus away could he please tell her where he had put him and she would go get him.

The man then said one word to her. “Mary.” She immediately recognized that it was Jesus.

But person, you just told me Jesus died on the cross. How could that be him?

He did? God raised him from the dead? And Mary was the first one to see him?

Do you think I could see him too?

24 Comments

Posted by Bongo on April 8, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Christianity, Easter, faith, God, Jesus, Mary Magdalene, Pets, Tomb

Why Did They Want to Kill Him?

25 Mar

What are you telling me, person? You mean that little baby you told me about last Christmas – the one who was born where all the animals were – grew up to be a man and then people wanted to kill him? Why would they want to do that?

Yeah, Jesus. That’s who I’m talking about. Why would they want to kill him?

He did? He performed miracles and healed lots of people? Is that why they wanted to kill him? I don’t get it.

Did Jesus heal animals too?

He taught people about God and the Kingdom of Heaven? Didn’t they like God? Is that why they wanted to kill him?

He told people to do things like love their enemies? Okay, now I get it. They must have thought he was nuts. He tried to take away the fun of giving someone what for.

What, that wasn’t it either? Then what?

People followed him instead of the religious leaders? And Jesus told the religious leaders they were hypocrites that were leading people away from God? Oh, now I get it. I think.

So the religious leader got jealous of Jesus? And mad at him?

He did? He told people he is the Son of God? Why would he say that if he knew it would upset people? He could have just kept quiet and no one would have bothered him.

But person, that doesn’t make sense at all. You mean he came and was born so he could die on a cross? I don’t get it. Couldn’t he have asked God to rescue him?

He could? Then why didn’t he? Did he at least give all those religious leaders what for?

No way! He asked God to forgive them? I really don’t get it now.

He died on that cross because he loves us? I love you person, but I don’t want to die on a cross.

He had to take all the sins on himself so everybody could be with God? Didn’t God like Jesus?

He loves people too, so He was willing to sacrifice His only Son for all the people? And he saved the lives of animals too because they didn’t have to be sacrificed anymore? That’s cool. That means He loves animals too.

But I still don’t get it.

I have to hear the rest of the story and that happens on Easter?

Oh, Easter. That’s the day I get to steal the candy out of the plastic eggs.

28 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 25, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Christianity, Easter, faith, God, Jesus, Pets, Son of God

Save the Donkey

18 Mar

A donkey did what? No way!

Okay person, I’ll tell this story without skipping over parts. I just can’t get over that donkey. I want to talk about the donkey.

Okay, I’ll wait. My person says when the Israelites were following Moses, the King of Moab became afraid of them. He thought they were going to wipe out his country. So he sent messengers to a diviner named Balaam to come and put a curse on them. But God told Balaam not to put a curse on the Israelites because they were blessed. Am I blessed person? I think I should be blessed too.

Okay, I’ll go back to the story. So Balaam said he couldn’t go with those messengers.

Those messengers went back to the king and told him Balaam wouldn’t come, so what did that king do? He sent even more messengers and told Balaam he would reward him handsomely. This time God told him to go, but to only do what He told him to do.

Hey person. Do you think Balaam wanted the money more than he wanted to do what God said? Because I think God knew Balaam was up to something. Was he up to no good?

Because God sent an angel to block his way. And the angel had his sword drawn.

Well, Balaam couldn’t see the angel but his donkey could. His donkey turned off the road and Balaam beat her. That poor donkey. All she was trying to do was save Balaam.

After that the angel of the Lord stood in a narrow path. The donkey pressed close to a wall and crushed Balaam’s foot. So he beat her again. I think I’m going to give Balaam what for.

Then that angel moved to a place where there was no way around so that donkey laid down under Balaam. And Balaam beat her with his staff.

Then God made the donkey so she could talk. This is so cool! That donkey asked Balaam why he was beating her.

Balaam actually answered his donkey and said if he’d had a sword he would kill her for making a fool of him.

The donkey asked the mean old Balaam if she hadn’t been a good donkey that didn’t normally act this way.

Balaam agreed this was not the way the donkey normally acted, and then the Lord let him see the angel. That angel gave Balaam what for and told him if his donkey hadn’t saved him he would have killed Balaam, but not the donkey.

I think Balaam got off lucky. That donkey and angel should have given him a really good talking to and then given him what for some more.

Hey person, if I let you ride on me do you think an angel would show up and teach me to talk?

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 18, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Angel of the Lord, Balaam, Bible, dogs, Donkey, faith, God, Israelites, Pets

Sneaking Up

11 Mar

You mean that mean old King Saul went after David again?

I don’t believe it. King Saul went after David with 3000 men and David only had 600 men? I sure hope David had some dogs to help him out too. My dog buddies would give King Saul what for.

What do you mean, that’s not part of the story? I think dogs should be in the story.

Okay person, I’ll try to tell the story right.

David found out where King Saul had camped and he went there and saw where Saul and Abner, the commander of the army, had lain down. Saul was inside the camp with his army around him, and he had stuck his spear in the ground near his head.

Well, David took another man named Abishai with him and they snuck up on King Saul while everyone was sleeping. I sure would have liked to sneak up on King Saul too.

I could be quiet enough. I could. What if someone woke up while David was sneaking in?

See? If the Lord put everyone in a deep sleep they wouldn’t wake up for me either.

Okay, I’ll go back to the story.

Abishai wanted to kill King Saul with his spear but David wouldn’t let him because King Saul was the Lord’s anointed. So what did David do? He took King Saul’s spear and water jug and they left.

Come on David, you’ve got to stir up more mischief than that. That would hardly count for a Monday Mischief Blog Hop.

So David did what next? He did?

David went up on a hill a ways away and yelled at King Saul and Abner and told them what he’d done.

Is that it, person? When is God going to give King Saul what for?

Really? My person says that eventually King Saul died in battle and David got to be king, but David still kept having adventures after that.

I wish I could be David’s dog. I like having adventures.

No person, I’m happy being your dog, but your adventures are mild compared to David’s. After all, I am Super Dog.

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on March 11, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Abishai, Abner, Bible, David, dogs, faith, God, King Saul, Lord, Pets

Hidden in a Cave

26 Feb

Person, what do you mean you’re not going to tell me the story of those other sheep? You promised.

Well, I figured you meant you’d tell me that story next. I don’t want to wait.

Okay, I’ll listen. But this better be good.

My person says that after David escaped from King Saul, King Saul chased him around the countryside because he still wanted to kill him. For a time David hid in the cave of Adullam and his family and lots of men joined him there. The men that joined him did not have the best of character. They were the distressed, indebted, and the discontent. Person, I’m not sure what all those words mean.

Okay, I’ll listen.

My person says that David became the leader of all those men that have words with D in them. He even straightened some of them out.

How did he do that, person?

He what? He did? My person says that one of the things David did was to set a good example for the men. I set good examples. I could straighten out those men.

One of the times that King Saul was chasing David he went into a cave to relieve himself. This was not any cave. It happened to be the cave that David and his men were in. They were far back in it so King Saul didn’t see them.

While King Saul was doing his business, David crept up on him and…

He didn’t kill him? But any normal person would kill someone who was out to kill them. After all, it’s self defense.

Do you believe it? David didn’t kill King Saul. Instead he cut off the corner of his robe. Then he felt guilty for even doing that, because King Saul was the Lord’s anointed.

So David went out of the cave and told King Saul what he had done. He said he’d done nothing against King Saul and wouldn’t. David gave it to the Lord to avenge the wrongs King Saul had done to him.

Person, I think the Lord is more powerful than David. I wouldn’t want Him after me. So what happened to King Saul? Something really nasty?

What do you mean, that’s another story? I would think he’d get struck down right there.

He did? King Saul left? But he went after David again later?

I don’t get it. I think I’ll gather up my dog buddies and go after King Saul right now. See you later.

Jealousy Can Be Deadly (bongodogblog.com)
A Sling and a Stone (bongodogblog.com)
Harp Service (bongodogblog.com)

28 Comments

Posted by Bongo on February 26, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: David, faith, God, Israel, King Saul, Pets

In the Temple

01 Jan

“Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother: ‘This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too.’” Luke 2:34-35

Okay person, I’m confused. What are these words you put on my blog talking about? Is this about the baby who started out life in a manger? After all, his mother’s name was Mary. These words don’t sound good.

Now I’m really confused. My person said this is the same child, but these words by Simeon will have to wait until later stories. She said that when the baby was eight days old they circumcised him – they what? – my person says “never mind” – and at that time they gave him the name Jesus like the angel had told them to.

My person says they met Simeon when they took Jesus to the temple to consecrate him. Hey person, I haven’t heard about any animals in this story yet. Oh yeah? They what? She says there were animals at the temple that they used for sacrifices. I didn’t know what a sacrifice was so I asked my person and she told me I didn’t want to know. Well whatever it is, I hope they treat those animals nice.

Simeon had the Holy Spirit upon him and was told he would not die before he’d seen the Lord’s Christ. When he saw Jesus in the temple courts he knew he had seen God’s salvation. There was also an old lady named Anna who was a prophetess and she knew who Jesus was too.

Mary must have been pretty upset when Simeon told her about that sword. Maybe she should let Jesus have a pet dog. That dog would protect them.

20 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 1, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, dogs

Tags: Anna, Christ, Christianity, faith, God, Holy Spirit, Jesus, Mary, Pets, Simeon

The Shepherds See

25 Dec

“I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” Luke 2:10b – 11

What is it with my person? She keeps putting stuff on my blog that I didn’t write. Is this another Bible story? All I can say is it better be a good one – and the last one had animals, so try to beat that.

Animals and angels? No way! Okay, I’m listening.

My person told me that the night baby Jesus was born there were shepherds in some nearby fields watching their flocks. I bet it was cold and dark out there. Those shepherds must have really loved those sheep to stay out there with them. I wonder if they cuddled up with their sheep dogs to keep warm.

Okay person. You can go on with the story. I was just thinking about those animals. I love the parts with animals. Well, the shepherds were sitting around all cuddled up with their dogs and an angel appeared to them. They were really scared when they saw that angel and the angel had to tell them not to be afraid. Then that angel told the shepherds about the baby that would save them and that the baby would be lying in a manger.

When that angel finished talking a whole bunch of angels appeared and started praising God. When all those angels left, those shepherds must have been looking at each other really funny. “Did you see that?” “Pinch me please.” “Did we all see the same thing?”

Those shepherds decided to go to Bethlehem and check things out for themselves and when they got there they found Mary and Joseph, and there was a baby lying in a manger. I bet it was the first time they saw a baby in a manger – I mean, who would want to put their baby in a trough that animals ate out of?

The shepherds went out to tell everyone they could find what they had seen. They glorified and praised God and people were amazed at their story.

My person says that Mary treasured all these things and pondered them in her heart.

That must have been a special baby. For angels to choose to tell people that hung out with sheep and sheep dogs, and for the baby to be born where animals hang out? What a great way to start out in life.

20 Comments

Posted by Bongo on December 25, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Angel, Bethlehem, Christ, Christmas, dogs, God, Jesus, Joseph, Mary, Pets, Shepherd

Angels are Busy

11 Dec

“All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: ‘The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’ – which means, ‘God with us.’” Matthew 1:22-23

There she goes again – putting words on my blog that I didn’t write. Come on person, isn’t this my blog?

More Bible stories? Are there animals? A bunch of my blogging friends told me there would be animals coming in the story you started last week.

What!!! You mean I have to wait one more week before you get to the animals? I think you’re just stringing me along. I think I’ll go lie down on my bed and go to sleep.

Okay, I’ll stay for another angel story. That angel Gabriel was something else though – telling Mary she was going to have a baby while she was still a virgin. I guess I’m listening.

My person started telling me about Joseph. You know, that guy that Mary was engaged to. My person said that marriage customs were different then than they are now. Once two people in Israel in Bible times became engaged, they were committed to each other the same as if they were already married. They had to actually have a divorce to become unengaged. I’m not quite sure I get it. Dogs don’t do that marriage thing.

Anyway, Joseph found out Mary was pregnant and since he followed God and had respected Mary he figured she hadn’t been faithful to him. I bet he was pretty upset. He decided he would divorce her quietly.

But then my person says an angel came to Joseph in a dream. I like the angel that came to Mary better. She was wide awake.

Okay person, I’ll stop making side comments. At least I’ll try.

My person says Joseph didn’t need to be awake because he listened to that angel in his dream. The angel told Joseph not to be afraid to take Mary as his wife because her baby came from the Holy Spirit. The angel also said that Mary would have a son and Joseph was to name him Jesus, because the son will save his people from their sins.

I’m not sure what that is that people need saving from. Sins must be something that people have and not dogs. Am I missing out on something here?

26 Comments

Posted by Bongo on December 11, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Christianity, dogs, faith, God, HolySpirit, Jesus, Joseph, Mary, Pets

Hanging with Sheep

27 Nov

My person said she wanted to tell me about a person in the Bible named David and she thought I’d probably like him. When I asked her why she said that he started out as a shepherd and he probably had shepherd dogs to help him with the sheep. I like this guy already.

My person told me that David grew up in the town of Bethlehem and that even though he lived about a thousand years before, he had a lot to do with another person who started out in Bethlehem around a lot of animals. I asked my person who and she said that’s another story and we’ll get to it soon.

That’s okay, I want to hear about David and his shepherd dogs.

Well, my person said one day when David was out with his sheep a prophet named Samuel came to his father’s house. Samuel had been told by God to go to David’s father Jesse’s house and anoint one of Jesse’s sons as king. David had seven older brothers and Samuel thought that some of them looked like likely candidates to be king, but God told Samuel it didn’t matter what people looked like. He was more interested in their heart.

I’m sure David had a good heart because he was good to animals. Anyway, my person said that Samuel must have been perplexed (what kind of a word is that?) because God told him that He had not chosen any of the sons that were there. Samuel asked Jesse if he had any more sons and Jesse told him his youngest was out tending the sheep.

They called for David and when he came God told Samuel he was the one. David not only had a good heart, he was handsome too.

My person said when Samuel anointed David king there was already another king named Saul, so David didn’t get to be king right away. She said David had lots of adventures because of Saul but for now he got to go back and be with the sheep. How cool is that? A king that likes hanging out with his sheep.

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 27, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bethlehem, Bible, David, dogs, God, Pets, Samuel

To the Dogs

20 Nov

My person told me that not all the people in the Bible were good. I didn’t believe her so she started telling me a story about an evil queen named Jezebel. Before I sat down ready to listen I asked her if there were any animals in the story. She said there were – dogs actually – but she said I probably didn’t want to hear about it. She said it was very sad.

I said I’d listen and decide for myself so my person started telling me the story. She said Jezebel was married to King Ahab, the king of Israel, and they were both very bad. Jezebel worshiped Baal instead of the one true God and she got King Ahab to worship Baal too.

I wasn’t sure if worshipping Baal was important, but then my person said Jezebel killed all the prophets of God that she could find. That was pretty bad.

Well one day King Ahab became upset because he wanted to buy a vineyard and the man who owned it wouldn’t sell it to him. Jezebel knew how to take care of that. She had that vineyard owner killed and then told King Ahab to go get the vineyard – it belonged to him now.

I guess it was sad about that vineyard owner, but I started getting really angry at that mean old Queen Jezebel. I told my person maybe she should stop because I felt some growls about to erupt.

My person said there was just a little bit more because when King Ahab went to that vineyard Elijah showed up. Ahab and Elijah didn’t get along very well but Jezebel really hated Elijah and wanted to kill him. It sounds like she wanted to kill everybody. Elijah was a prophet of the Lord and he told King Ahab Jezebel would get her fair share. He said that dogs would devour her.

My person said that that is what eventually happened. I am so bummed. Not about Jezebel. She deserved it and my growls are calming down now. But those poor dogs. They must have been really hungry. Didn’t they have any good pet stores in those days? Someone could have made a lot of money by opening up a pet store so people could buy their dogs some good food and tasty treats.

26 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 20, 2011 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: dogs, Elijah, faith, God, Jezebel, King Ahab, Pets