RSS

Category Archives: humor

Worrying Never Helps

Hey person, last week you told me one of Jesus’ stories about the man who stored up all his stuff for himself.

Well, it didn’t go so good for him so I decided I’d get rid of some of my stuff.

So if you’ll give me all my treats I’ll eat them and that will be the end of that.

Then I’ll get rid of all my toys. The ones I’ve chewed up, that is.

What do you mean, you’ve already gotten rid of the chewed up ones? How am I supposed to get rid of my stuff if you’ve already done it for me?

Okay, I’ll listen to the next story. But I hope it doesn’t say I have to get rid of even more stuff. I still have some toys that I haven’t chewed up yet.

***

Jesus was talking to His disciples and He said, “Do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear.”

***

Whew! I don’t worry about clothes. But about that eating stuff, I sure hope you remember to feed me on time person.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Jesus said, “Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.”

***

What is Jesus talking about? Food is everything!

I am too listening.

***

Jesus continued, “Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!

***

I sure hope I’m more valuable than those pesky ravens. They steal eggs from the little bird’s nests.

***

Jesus said, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”

***

If I don’t worry will that make my life longer? Just make sure you feed me on time, person.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Then Jesus said, “Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will He clothe you, O you of little faith!

***

What’s all this business about clothes? King Solomon can keep all his fancy clothes. Just feed me on time.

***

“And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink,” said Jesus. “Do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.”

***

So if I seek God’s kingdom I’ll get food and treats and everything? Maybe some new toys too?

10 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 6, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, dogs, faith, God, Jesus, Pets, Religion and Spirituality, Solomon, Worry

Waiting for the Camera

05 Oct

Finally!

My person let me go for a walk with her and her new camera.

Maybe it was because I helped her with her homework by jumping for all those pictures at the dog park.

Anyway, playing second fiddle to a camera is no fun. Now I’ve just got to figure out how to make that camera play second fiddle to me.

It’s okay to go on walks with that camera, but it’s much more fun without it.

I have to wait around while my person fiddles with the knobs and dials on that camera – and then finally takes a picture.

And it’s never a picture of me.

What’s with all these strange things anyway?

They don’t even smell good.

And what makes it even worse is you can’t smell anything in a picture.

I’ll never figure out what people see in these pictures.

Guess I’ll just hang out here and wait.

My person will get tired of that non-smelly camera one of these days.

24 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 5, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Camera, Flower, Pets, Photography

Friendly Romp – Blocked

04 Oct

I don’t think my person trusts me. Today we were on the trails and some people and two dogs came toward us.

They stepped off the trail so we could pass. Usually my person makes me step off the trail, but this time they did it first.

Pretty cool because now we can walk right by those dogs and I can go over and say hi.

Well you know what my person did?

She grabbed my collar as we were walking by so when I tried to go see those dogs I ended up walking on my two hind legs.

I know people walk this way all the time but for a dog it’s undignified. I really don’t know what my person’s problem is – embarrassing me like that.

I’m nice to other dogs – – – sometimes.

We walked on and my person did it to me again.

We’d been hearing coyotes howling for awhile and we started getting closer. I thought those coyotes might be fun dogs to play with so I started pulling my person along toward them.

You know what she did this time?

She shortened my leash so I couldn’t catch her off guard and pull it out of her hand. Then she said something about those coyotes and about me being a dead dog.

Dead dog my foot. If you won’t let me have any fun person, I’m taking you back to the house.

23 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 4, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: collar, Coyote, Dog, Leash, Pets, Recreation, Trail, walk, Wildlife

National Walk Your Dog Week

03 Oct

We’re right in the middle of it – and it’s one of the best weeks there is.

It means I get to go out for walks every day.

Wait a minute. I go out for walks almost every day anyway.

So what’s so special about this week?

I guess I’d better tell you what week it is.

It’s National Walk Your Dog Week.

And I’ve got to tell all you dogs out there that if you’re not taking your people for walks all the time you’re missing out on a lot of adventures.

My person says it’s good exercise for her and for me. I guess that’s okay.

But what’s more important are the messages I find on my trails from my trail dog buddies.

And the dogs and people I get to meet and greet.

By the way, I think I got a new girlfriend today. She was really cute and she wouldn’t leave me alone. Woo woo! More benefits of going out for walks.

If I didn’t go out for walks all the time my life would be boring.

I wouldn’t have adventures to tell you about.

So if I didn’t go for walks and have adventures you’d probably fall asleep when you read my blog.

It would be that boring.

It would probably be like reading a blog that Scratchy wrote.

Come to think of it, maybe I should start a National Walk Your Cat Week. Scratchy might have something interesting to say then.

Oh wait, never mind. He’d probably try to steal my blog.

***

National Walk Your Dog Week was founded by pet Lifestyle Expert & Animal Behaviorist Colleen Paige. Sponsored by – Animal Miracle Foundation, and can be found on the web at http://www.walkyourdogweek.com.

33 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 3, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Bongo, Layla, National Walk Your Dog Week, Pets, Scratchy, walk

Worn Out Walk

02 Oct

Yesterday my person took me to the dog park – with her camera. She wanted to take pictures of motion, so I ran and jumped and moved every way I could think of.

I worked really hard.

And today I’m worn out.

My feet hurt, my muscles are sore, and all I want to do is sleep.

But my person wanted to go for a walk.

How can I say no to a walk?

I hope my person understands though, and lets me have extra sniffing time so I can rest.

Hey person, this is my favorite spot.

My message rock.

I need to stop and sniff rest here for awhile.

Okay, I’m coming. But I hope you know that you’re wearing me to the bone.

I can hardly go any further. At least we’re on our way back home.

Wait a minute! You mean I have to go uphill to get back home?

I don’t remember this hill ever being here before.

I don’t believe it!

I’m all worn out from helping my person yesterday and what does she do?

She puts a hill in my way.

23 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 2, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Pets, tired, Trail, walk, worn out

Homework at the Dog Park

01 Oct

I take everything back that I said about my person’s new camera. At least for now.

And here’s why.

My person’s photography class assignment for this week is “Motion.”

And who could come up with something more filled with motion than me?

So I got to go to the dog park today, where there’s lots of room to move.

And my person brought Frisbees and balls along – and her camera.

When we first got to the dog park there was one other dog hanging out. And it turned out to be my good buddy Pablo. I think my person planned that because she didn’t seem surprised.

But then my girlfriend Layla arrived. A regular dog party!

After I got done sniffing around I had to get to work. And it was the most fun work I’ve done in a long time. I guess it will work better if I just show you.

And they even gave me a place to wash off afterwards.

39 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 1, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Activities, ball, Dog Park, Frisbee, Layla, Pablo, Pets, Photography, Recreation

Mischief: Week Two

30 Sep

This is the second week in a row that I’ve had to post mischief about my people.

I don’t know what such a perfect dog is doing with such mischievous people.

I mean, how do I deserve this?

I guess I’d better tell you what happened.

First, my person left early in the morning.

I didn’t worry too much.

I figured she’d be back soon and take me for a walk on my trails.

Well, she came back all right.

And you know what she did?

She picked up my younger person and they both left in her car.

Without me.

All I got was a little bathroom break in the backyard.

And when they got back home a long time later – I snuck a peek while my person put pictures on her my computer from that new camera of hers. You know, the one that she takes walks with and leaves me at home.

And I couldn’t believe what I saw.

My people went and hung out with bears!

They went to a place called Bearizona – without me.

But that wasn’t the worst of it.

I can see maybe hanging out with bears for an afternoon.

But what else they did really makes me feel dejected.

They hung out with chickens.

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

38 Comments

Posted by Bongo on September 30, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: American black bear, Bear, Bearizona, chickens, mischief, Pets

Storing up Stuff

29 Sep

The Parable of the Rich Fool by Rembrandt - photo credit Wikipedia

The Parable of the Rich Fool by Rembrandt, 1627.

Hey person, I prayed and I’m still waiting for the fish.

God is being slow in answering my prayer. I figured fish would be falling from the sky by now.

What? You’re going to tell me one of Jesus’ parables about collecting too much stuff?

Fish isn’t stuff. I wouldn’t collect it, I’d eat it.

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

***

A crowd had gathered around Jesus and someone in the crowd said to Him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”

Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” Then He said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”

***

You tell him, Jesus!

Not me. I’m not trying to collect all kinds of possessions. I would eat the fish as soon as I got it.

I am listening.

***

And Jesus told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man produced a good crop. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’

***

I could help him eat his crops.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

Then the man said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’

***

I think I’m going to go be that man’s dog.

***

But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

***

Oops! Hey person, I didn’t mean what I said. I’m the most faithfullest dog there is. I would never leave you.

***

Then Jesus said, “This is how it will be with anyone who stores up things for himself but is not rich toward God.”

***

That doesn’t count toys and dog treats, does it?

16 Comments

Posted by Bongo on September 29, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Christianity, dogs, Fish, God, Jesus, Pets, possessions, Prayer, Religion and Spirituality

That’s Not How You Do It

28 Sep

I don’t get it. My person just doesn’t make sense at all.

Normally she doesn’t care about smells.

But today she’s walking along the trails saying how good things smell.

I don’t think she gets it.

I smell things in the air all the time. But I don’t smell anything special today.

Different maybe, but not special.

I guess I’ve got to train my person.

It’s not the air smells that count.

You’ve got to get up close and personal to really smell things. To really get the message.

That’s better person, but not good enough.

You’ve got to stick your nose right into those flowers.

What do you mean, you don’t want to do that? You’re trying to get all the best smells, aren’t you?

You cannot smell all best smells from that far away.

I don’t believe it!

Do I have to show you person?

Oh, does that smell good. One of my best friends was by here not too long ago.

Okay person, now you try.

19 Comments

Posted by Bongo on September 28, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: flowers, Fragrance, Pets, Smell, Trail

Bug Convention

27 Sep

My person and I headed up to my trails just like any other day, when I spotted it.

The biggest bug I’ve seen in a long time.

You never know what you’re going to find on my trails.

And the bugs around here seem to have the brightest colors.

But just when I thought I’d seen it all for one day, I turned around.

And there it was.

And I hadn’t even left the parking lot yet.

I figured maybe there was a bug convention meeting in the parking lot so I ought to head out on the trails.

I don’t think those big bugs can fit on my little skinny trails so I should be safe there.

But I was totally wrong.

The big bugs were hanging out in the parking lot, but…

they sent the little bugs on ahead to my trails.

Yikes! I think they’re after me!

There must be a can of bug repellant around here somewhere.

13 Comments

Posted by Bongo on September 27, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: bugs, Insect, Pets, Trail, Volkswagen Bug

Bongo
Bongo on Facebook

Bongo on Facebook
Email Subscription

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Email Address:
Recent Adventures
- Dirt Pile
- Diggers
- ROAD CLOSED
- Ten Years!
- What Did I do with My Summer Vacation?
- Transformed Puddle
- The Almost Really Good Day
- The Best Way to End the Year
Past Adventures
Past Adventures
Awards

Category Archives: humor

Bongo

Email Subscription

Recent Adventures

Past Adventures

Awards