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Category Archives: humor

Don’t Sniff the Cactus

Today was tour guide day on my trails. And I got loves for payment – even though I let my person give the people directions.

I would have given the directions if she’d let me, but I couldn’t get a word in edgewise – and she wouldn’t let me off my leash. I could have led them right up the path.

We got the first group on their way and then we met some more people. They were from Chicago. I’m not sure where Chicago is, but it must be a strange place because they don’t have any cactus there.

And one of those people asked my person a question. “How do you keep a dog from sniffing cactus?”

She should have asked me that because I have the answer. It only takes one time.

But really, dogs don’t need to sniff cactus because nobody leaves their messages on them. Well, maybe once – but then they never do it again.

So if I do notice a message on a cactus I know it’s probably from a Chicago dog, or a new pup – but never from one of my friends.

You see that tree over there?

That’s where all the messages are.

And that’s why we Arizona dogs don’t sniff cactus.

38 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 6, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Cactus, Chicago, Pets, Sedona, Sedona Arizona, Trail

We have a serious problem around here. Our 4Runner has been moping around in the driveway for a long time. The 4Runner that takes me down the bumpy roads to the swimming hole. I miss my swimming hole. I want to go back.

My person says she won’t take her little car down those bumpy roads, so I’ve got to figure out a way to get that 4Runner moving again.

I wonder if it’s depressed. Maybe I can cheer it up.

Hey 4Runner, want to play a game of catch? Or maybe I could give you some treats. Ooh – that would be really hard sharing my treats with anyone – but for swimming I guess I could sacrifice a few.

I don’t believe it! That 4Runner’s not going to go for either of those things. I’ll have to figure out something else.

Maybe I could get one of those pesky squirrels to come down and tickle its belly. That ought to get it going. There’s a problem though. I can’t seem to get those pesky squirrels to come down out of those trees.

Maybe the javelina could give it a push when they’re doing things like pushing over garbage cans. I guess I’ll have to stay up all night so I can catch them when they come. That might be hard.

Hey, wait a minute! I found the problem. No wonder the 4Runner isn’t going anywhere.

Spiders have tied it down.

Does anybody have any silk cutters?

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

41 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 5, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Pets, spider web, spiders, Toyota 4Runner

Exploring the Land

04 Nov

English: Moses and the Messengers from Canaan, by Giovanni Lanfranco, oil on canvas, 85-3/4 x 97 inches, at the J. Paul Getty Museum, Los Angeles (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Those Israelites that Moses was leading sure had to hang out in the desert for a long time before God would let them go to the Promised Land.

Really? They finally were almost there? Are they going to march right in and take over?

Oh. They sent some explorers in first, huh? That’s what God told Moses to do? I guess that’s a pretty good idea. Could I go with them? I could wear my explorer hat.

What do you mean, I don’t have an explorer hat?

I wouldn’t run off. Really I wouldn’t.

I’m listening.

Moses sent a leader from each of the twelve tribes of Israel to explore the land. He told them to see what the people were like and what kind of land they lived in. He told them to see if the towns were fortified or not, if the land was good for farming, and if there were trees. And he asked them to bring back some of the fruit of the land.

Could they bring back some dog treats too?

Yes, I’ll listen.

Those men explored the land for forty days and when they came back they brought a branch with a cluster of grapes that was so big it took two of them to carry it on a pole between them.

That’s a lot of grapes. I hope they’ll share some with me.

What do you mean, dogs aren’t supposed to eat grapes? I think they should go back then and get something I can eat. A nice meaty bone maybe.

I’ve been listening all along.

The explorers told Moses that the land truly was a land flowing with milk and honey, but the people were powerful, the cities fortified, and they even saw giants.

Only Caleb and Joshua said that they should go take the land, because those two knew that God was with them and they could do it.

The other ten explorers turned the Israelites against Moses and Aaron and they all grumbled. They were afraid they would all die by the sword and their wives and children would be taken as plunder. They wanted to choose a leader to take them back to Egypt.

The Lord became angry with the people, and Moses had to talk Him out of destroying them and using Moses to start a new nation.

So what happened? Did they go back to Egypt?

They did? They had to hang out in the desert for forty years? Wow! That’s a long time.

No way! God said everyone over twenty except Joshua and Caleb would die in the desert during those forty years? And their children would be the ones to take the land?

Do you think when those children go in there they could get me some treats?

14 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 4, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Caleb, dogs, faith, God, Israelite, Joshua, Lord, Moses, Pets

Trail Lights

03 Nov

That’s really weird. Someone took some orange Halloween lights and put them on this manzanita bush, way out here on my trails. They didn’t even pick a bush next to the trail. They had to climb way under this tree to get them on there. If I wasn’t so close to the ground I would have walked right by and never noticed them.

Why would somebody do that?

And look at this bush. They didn’t even put the lights on the side you could see the best. Maybe they’re not decorating for us people and dogs that walk by on my trails. Do you think they did this for the squirrels and the bunnies? Or maybe those invisible creatures that were hanging around here on Halloween? I hope they’re not still around.

Wow! Look at this one. It’s really lit up. I think I’m safe now. All those bright lights probably scared those creatures away.

Check this one out. It’s right on the trail, but the lights seem to be fading. I hope it already scared all the creatures away because I think it’s running out of electricity.

Click here for more great pet blogs.

25 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 3, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Halloween, lights, manzanita, Pets, Photography, Trail

Tumbleweed Seeds

02 Nov

They came here all the way from Russia? Isn’t that a long ways away?

What? You mean they came over here before they even had airplanes? So they had ships full of tumbleweeds coming all the way over here? They must have known that without them the Wild West wouldn’t be the same. But it must have taken a lot of ships to bring all those tumbleweeds over. Those things are big.

Oh. They have little bitty seeds, huh? And it only took a few mixed in with the flaxseed? How come we don’t have flax rolling all over the place?

Oh. Flax doesn’t roll, huh?

Last spring we had baby tumbleweeds growing in my wash, but the rain came and water flowed through my wash, and those tumbleweeds disappeared before they were big enough to tumble.

But this one must have grown somewhere else, because it sure was big enough to tumble into my wash.

But since these tumbleweeds are so much a part of the Wild West, does that mean the Wild West is a part of the tumbleweeds?

There’s probably going to be a couple men on horses galloping down my wash any minute. And then a few minutes later the Sheriff’s Posse will be coming after them.

I think I’d better move away from this tumbleweed before I get run over.

26 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 2, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: American Old West, Flax, Pets, Russia, tumbleweeds, Wild West

Ghost Cars

01 Nov

Yesterday was Halloween and there was not one car in the parking lot by my trails. This was absolutely not possible on a day like this. It was sunny and warm – the perfect kind of day. So I’m sure there were cars parked there – the kind you can’t see.

Ghost cars.

I was a little nervous going through that parking lot – but nothing happened.

I expected to see a lot of people on my trails on a day like this. Even ghost cars have to be driven there by someone.

But I only saw one person – and she was all white. I think she might have been a ghost.

With all this going on I thought maybe I’d see Ghost Dog, but no such luck. He must have been invisible too.

And then, to top it off – there weren’t even any litterbugs visible. Ghost litterbugs could be really dangerous.

Litter could appear out of nowhere. Right before my eyes. Yikes! I’d better get out of here!

Finally, after all those ghosts and invisible things, I found someone that I could see.

But that quail must have thought it was invisible, because it let us get really close to it. That’s just not normal.

33 Comments

Posted by Bongo on November 1, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Gambel's Quail, Ghost, Halloween, Litter Bugs, Pets, Phantom vehicle, Quail, Sedona, Sedona Arizona, Trail

What’s That Chattering?

31 Oct

We were finishing up our trail walk and heading back to the street – but not at the normal place where we usually hit the street. I heard somebody chattering at me. I looked everywhere and couldn’t figure out where that chattering was coming from. Until I finally figured there was nowhere else to look. And the chattering came again.

With the corner of my eye I caught some movement above me – and there he was. Looking at me. That pesky squirrel.

Come on down here squirrel! You think you’re so brave way up there on that wire. Come on down and face me on the ground.

You know what that squirrel did? He turned and started running down the wire – away from me.

I knew that pesky squirrel wasn’t brave enough. He ran down the wire and never did come back. I bet he went looking for another dog to harass.

He was probably afraid to go messing with me. Afraid I might fly right up to that wire and go after him.

After all, I am Super Dog.

31 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 31, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Pets, Squirrel, Trail, wire

Pine Nuts

30 Oct

What do you mean, person? Food grows on my trails? You mean besides the running, hopping, and flying kind?

No person, I’d never eat any of those little furry or feathery things. I’m a good dog. Remember?

But what kind of food is there besides that?

It’s in those pine trees? I don’t want to eat pine cones, and pine needles would be totally yucky. You must be thinking of some other kind of tree. And those other kind don’t grow on my trails.

What? There’s food in the pine cones. Pine nuts? And you can take the shells off of the nuts and eat them?

Woo woo! Look, I found some of those nuts right here on the ground. I wonder why some forest critter hasn’t eaten them yet?

Yuck! Gross! Ptouie!

Hey person, there’s something wrong with these nuts. They’re all dried out. No wonder those forest critters left them on the ground. We’ve got to return these back to the forest for a refund.

29 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 30, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Pets, Pine nut, pinyon pine, Trail

Mischief in the Air

29 Oct

It was so cool this weekend. There was mischief in the air and for once it wasn’t me. I got to enjoy it though. And I didn’t get in trouble.

My younger person came home this weekend. And he told me he missed me – and he even let me in his room.

But the best thing is – he brought a hat for Scratchy. He came across a little cup and decided to turn it into a hat. Well, obviously it was a hat for Scratchy because it wouldn’t fit any of the rest of us.

I don’t think Scratchy appreciated his gift, but it sure was fun watching him try to get it off.

Scratchy, hats aren’t all that bad. You should wear it for awhile. We can have a party.

See, I still have my hat left over from the dog party. I’ll even put it on for you.

What do you mean it turned my eyes two different colors?

Scratchy, I think we need to take off our hats now. This one’s giving away my party secrets.

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

39 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 29, 2012 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Cat, Cats and Dogs, hats, mischief, Pets, Scratchy

Sibling Rivalry

28 Oct

English: Miriam and Aaron complain against Moses, engraving from “The Bible and Its Story Taught by One Thousand Picture Lessons, vol. 2”, edited by Charles F. Horne and Julius A. Bewer, published by Francis R. Niglutsch, New York, 1908. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I thought Moses and his brother and sister were all grown up. You mean grownups make fun of each other too?

Okay, I’ll listen to the story.

Moses’ sister Miriam and his brother Aaron talked bad about Moses because he had married a Cushite woman.

Were they jealous of her? I bet they were.

I’m listening. Really.

God heard Miriam and Aaron talk bad about Moses and He said to them, “Come out to the Tent of Meeting, all three of you.”

Oh, oh. They’re in trouble now.

The Lord came down in a pillar of cloud and said to Aaron and Miriam that normally He reveals Himself to a prophet in visions and dreams. But Moses is faithful and He speaks to him face to face and clearly, rather than in riddles.

Oh. That wife thing was just an excuse, wasn’t it? I’d be jealous if God talked more to my brother too.

Then God asked Miriam and Aaron why they weren’t afraid to speak against His faithful servant Moses.

Oops. I guess they were told.

Yes, I’m still listening.

The Lord was mad at Miriam and Aaron and when He left the Tent Miriam was leprous. Aaron felt bad and asked Moses not to hold their sin against them.

So Moses cried out to the Lord and asked Him to heal Miriam.

I guess the Lord wanted to teach Miriam a lesson first because He told Moses to put her in time out outside the camp for seven days and then she could be brought back.

That’s a long time out.

So all the people stayed where they were while Miriam was in time out, and then they went to the Desert of Paran.

What do you mean, what lesson did I learn from that?

Well, those Israelites were all kind of in time out since they had to stay where they were while Miriam was in time out. So I guess if you want to get everyone in trouble with you, just talk bad about your brother.

Hey person, have you seen what Scratchy’s doing? He’s up to no good for sure.

12 Comments

Posted by Bongo on October 28, 2012 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Aaron, Bible, faith, God, Israelite, Lord, Miriam, Moses, Pets, Tabernacle