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Category Archives: humor

Stare Down

24 Jan

I went out in my yard today as innocent as can be.

All I wanted to do was play with my Frisbee.

Oh yeah, and take care of other things too.

When all of a sudden my attention was drawn upward.

Do you believe it?

This pesky squirrel was sitting on a wire staring down at me.

And we sat there having a staring contest.

I’ll get that pesky squirrel yet!

At least I won the contest.

That pesky squirrel couldn’t hold out very long.

And he…

Ran on down the wire.

What a chicken!

Wait. Umm. I mean –

Chickens are good.

To eat that is.

That squirrel ain’t no chicken.

He’s a …

He’s a…

Scaredy cat. That’s what he is!

20 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 24, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Frisbee, pesky squirrel, Pets, Squirrel

Slacking on the Job

23 Jan

You see what’s attached to me?

No, no! Not the leash.

Well, I guess you can’t see what’s attached to my leash, but you can probably figure it out.

My person is on the other end of it.

It’s kind of a burden sometimes but it’s one of my jobs.

I’ve got to take her out so she can get her exercise.

I thought all dogs had this on their job description.

But I found one today who doesn’t seem to think so.

Who is that hiding in the bushes?

I wonder if she ditched her person by going places her person couldn’t follow.

Here she comes.

Hey brown dog, if you’d stay on the trail like me you could be doing your dogly duty and giving your person exercise.

Say what?

Don’t tell me what to do.

It’s a little late to be hitting the trail now.

Where is your person anyway?

Fine. Be that way.

What is it with these personless brown dogs anyway?

It seems to be turning into an epidemic around here.

36 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 23, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: brown dog, exercise, Leash, Outdoors, Pets, Trail, Walking

Curly Competition

22 Jan

I thought I was safe this time of year.

No wildflowers are blooming, so my person isn’t getting her camera out every few minutes and making me wait while she takes pictures.

So I couldn’t understand why she pulled her camera out.

I mean, it’s the middle of winter – well, I think it is. The calendar says it is.

So what is there to take pictures of?

Except me, of course.

And I wasn’t doing anything spectacular at the time.

Nothing to take pictures of anyway.

And then my person gets up close and personal – with a weed.

I guess she’s pretty desperate.

She wants to take pictures so bad that she’s even willing to take pictures of weeds.

Maybe she should get another hobby.

I think I ought to help her along.

No, not with another hobby.

I don’t want her doing anything else that would take her attention from me.

No, I’m going to help her along by doing away with her subject matter.

By eating it.

24 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 22, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Camera, hobby, Pets, Photography, weeds

Strange Sounds

21 Jan

Sometimes when I’m out on my trails I hear strange sounds coming from the top of Sugarloaf.

In case you haven’t figured it out, Sugarloaf is that round, red, hill thing over there.

So anyway, back to those strange sounds.

Sometimes I hear people yelling from up there.

Sometimes someone is playing a flute.

I’ve even heard drums beating up there.

But today I heard one of the strangest sounds of all.

I heard chanting.

And not just any chanting.

Three people were chanting in unison.

They must have practiced a long time because they all were in the same place at the same time with their chant.

I heard that sound, but I had to look all over the place before I finally found where it was coming from.

So I had my person take a picture of those chanters so you could see them too.

But I think you might have to look as hard as I did in order to find them.

Happy chanting – I mean looking.

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 21, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: chanting, Pets, Sugarloaf, Trail

Danger Warning

20 Jan

They’re all over my trails.

Sometimes people we pass ask my person how she keeps me away from them.

But for the first time today someone warned us about them.

A boy who had just discovered them.

I don’t think he was attacked, but he saw the danger.

Those things have attitude.

And some of them hang out right next to my trails.

So close that you have to be careful not to brush against them.

But I think that boy might have been overly concerned.

Let me see.

Nope, he’s right.

Away, you prickly pear! Away!

Don’t get so close to my trails.

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

32 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 20, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Cactus, Pets, prickly pear, Trail

How Big is a Needle’s Eye?

19 Jan

I’m still waiting for all those loves from Jesus.

Maybe he’s waiting until you tell me another story about Him.

Maybe He’ll give me loves while you’re telling it.

So I’m listening.

***

Now a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”

***

You’ve got to hang out with Jesus for that eternal life stuff. Even I know that.

Yes, I’m listening.

***

“Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied.

“There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, obey the commandments.”

“Which ones?” the man inquired.

Jesus replied, “Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not steal, do not give false testimony, honor your father and mother, and love your neighbor as yourself.”

***

That’s me all over!

What do you mean, I sometimes accuse Scratchy of doing things that I really did?

He did too do all those things!

I always honor you and do what you say. After all, I’m the perfect dog.

I ran off? Oh, um – I came back to you didn’t I?

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

“All these things I have kept,” the young man said.

***

See, that man and I are two of a kind.

***

The man asked, “What do I still lack?”

Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

***

Wait, does that mean I have to sell all my treats?

Oh, I can do that. Jesus gives out fish.

***

When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

***

Young man, come back, come back. Jesus will give you all the fish you want!

***

Then Jesus said to His disciples, “I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”

***

It’s a good thing I’m just a poor dog – and a lot smaller than a camel.

Wait, how big is the eye of a needle?

***

When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, “Who then can be saved?”

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

***

Whew! I was beginning to worry.

I just found out how big one of those needle’s eyes is.

7 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 19, 2014 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, Christianity, faith, Jesus, Pets, rich young ruler

Where is Everybody?

18 Jan

There are hardly any people – or dogs – on my trails compared to what there were a few weeks ago.

I don’t get it.

The weather hasn’t changed.

If anything it’s gotten warmer – and sunnier.

My person says they all left town after the holidays to go back home.

Back to their houses in the snow.

I wish they’d send some snow over here.

That would be perfect – warm sunny days with snow to play in.

But there’s no snow.

There’s no people.

And there’s no dogs.

How am I supposed to have any adventures?

Guess I’ll go take a nap.

26 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 18, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: boredom, Hiking, Pets, sunny, Trail, warm

Kitchen Invasion

17 Jan

I didn’t notice it at first.

I thought everything was okay.

But then, when I saw this picture of me I found something extra in it.

Something that’s not supposed to be there.

And it for sure isn’t me.

And it isn’t my ball either.

This is serious.

Something’s invaded my kitchen!

I thought maybe I’d better look around, you know, get on my Detective Dog hat and investigate.

But my person wanted to take another picture.

Yikes!

Do you see them?

There are more of whatever those things are invading my kitchen.

What if they eat all the crumbs that fall on the floor?

Those are my crumbs!

It’s my job to eat them.

Person, you’d better do something about these little black things all over my kitchen.

Get them out of here!

This is a serious invasion, and besides them eating all my crumbs on the floor I think I’m going to have nightmares about them taking over.

They’re everywhere!

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on January 17, 2014 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: invasion, Kitchen, Pets, spiders

New Tags

16 Jan

What’s this?

There’s some kind of label on my trail cairn.

It’s never been here before.

I wonder what it’s supposed to do.

Maybe each trail cairn is going to get its own special tag.

Then when someone gives directions on my trails they don’t have to say, “Follow the cairns to the end of the trail.”

They could say, “Go past the red tagged cairn and turn left at the blue tagged cairn.”

That would make it so much easier to give directions.

Unless you forgot which tags were on which cairns.

If you told someone the wrong thing they might get really lost. They might end up at the trail that ends in a big hole instead of at the trail where they could climb a mountain like they really wanted to do.

Whoever put that tag on there needs to come up with something better.

But how am I going to tell them? I don’t even know who put that tag there.

Maybe if I sniff around I can find some clues.