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Category Archives: humor

Paw Print

06 Sep

Bongo looking at a paw print on a carI didn’t do it.

No, really I didn’t.

Some other dog beat me to it.

Some other dog put his paw print on that car.

I only do things like that when there’s somebody in a car that I want loves from.

And there’s nobody in that car.

So it wasn’t me.

I hope that other dog got some good loves.

Because it wasn’t me.

Person, maybe you’d better give me extra loves because I was a good dog.

I didn’t put my paw print on that car.

And I bet I missed out on some loves because of it.

I’ll take those loves now person.

Because if you don’t give them to me…

Magnet paw print on a car that says "Woof"

I might decide to put a paw print on your car.

 
24 Comments

Posted by on September 6, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Walking Without Me

05 Sep

Cholla fruitI have a real complaint.

My person got a new camera.

And now she leaves me home alone once a week.

She says she has to learn how to use her new camera – so she’s taking a class.

Please don’t tell her that I go on walks with my neighbor dog Toby while she’s gone.

But that’s not really what my complaint is.

Now that my person is taking a class she says she has to do her homework.

I always thought homework was called that because you do it at home.

I think my person’s confused because she thinks she has to do her homework out on my trails.

And she doesn’t take me.

Person, I promise I won’t mess up your pictures.

I might yank on my leash a little, but the thing you’re taking a picture of is still there.

Just try again.

Oh, come on. It’s been a very long time since I’ve pulled you over because I wanted to get at a coyote.

I won’t wreck your camera.

But no – I can’t convince my person.

So now she takes two walks on my trails.

One with me.

Thunder Mountain with mist

And one to do her homework.

Coffeepot Rock

But here’s what’s really bad.

While my person was out on one of her homework walks…

Sugarloaf and dark clouds

she saw my girlfriend Layla.

And she left me at home.

 
35 Comments

Posted by on September 5, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Missed the Swimming Hole

04 Sep

Bongo looking down a dry washDo you see that? Do you see it?

Right where I’m looking.

This is my wash here.

Normally it looks like this with no water in it.

You see where the grass is laying down?

Right there is a little trail that connects to the rest of my trails.

But the grass there is usually standing up tall.

That grass doesn’t normally lay down on the job.

And you know what that means?

It means that water came flowing down my wash and got so deep that it buried all that grass.

My wash turned into a regular swimming hole.

And I missed it.

I missed my chance to go swimming in my own wash.

By the time I got out here there was no water at all.

What, person? What are you trying to tell me?

What? When that water was here it was pouring down rain and thundering?

But that’s terrible!

How dare that rain and thunder be here at the same time as my swimming hole.

I bet that’s what chased my swimming hole away.

I mean, isn’t that kind of like raining on my parade?

Bongo next to a dry wash

 
22 Comments

Posted by on September 4, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Street Mushroom

03 Sep

Bongo on the trailStrange things pop up here sometimes in the summer after it rains.

Can you see it?

Oh wait, I guess you’re just looking at me in the picture. I can’t blame you for that.

That strange thing is pretty little. It barely shows.

.

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Bongo's feet near a little white, round mushroom

Is that better?

You see that little round thing next to my feet?

It’s a mushroom.

Here’s some more.

Two small, round, white mushrooms in the dirt

You’d never think mushrooms would grow in Arizona, but they do.

Little tiny ones grow on my trails when it’s warm and wet around here.

Our typical summer weather.

But this year I found something even more special.

Bongo on the street near a mushroom

This wasn’t on my trails at all.

I found it right by the street. Right near my house.

It’s way bigger than all those little mushrooms I found on my trails.

Well, except for a few I found last year – but only in one spot.

This has got to be a brand new species – one that nobody has ever found before.

So here it is.

Mushroom in grass

And since I found it I’m the one that gets to name it.

This is hard. What should I call it?

Oh I know.

I found it on my street so I’m going to call it Street Mushroom.

I bet there’s no other mushroom with a name like that.

 
27 Comments

Posted by on September 3, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Cat Mischief

02 Sep

Scratchy on the back of a futonSome people think it’s really cool living with a cat.

That’s because they have no idea what their cat is thinking.

Cats look so innocent and sweet. But deep down inside they are plotting how they can get you.

And when they do something mischievous they purr and rub against you and pretend to be ever so innocent.

And the dog always gets blamed.

You wouldn’t believe how many times I get blamed for things that Scratchy does.

I don’t know why everybody looks to me first.

I’m such a perfect dog. I don’t do anything wrong.

It’s always the cat.

I just wish my people would realize that.

When there’s garbage on the floor – it was the cat.

When the covers are messed up on the bed – it was the cat.

When my hair is all over the furniture that I’m not supposed to be on – it was because Scratchy rubbed up against me and put my hair there.

But finally, I’ve caught Scratchy in the act.

He was up to mischief and no way can he deny it.

And I kind of blame my person for this too.

She put food in my dish before I came back in the house.

I can’t help it if there were some new smells outside that I had to check out.

That’s my job, isn’t it? Making sure the yard is safe from anything causing strange odors.

So anyway, when I did come in I caught Scratchy in the act.

Scratchy eating Bongo's food

And it’s sure good I caught him when I did.

If I’d been a little later I might not have been able to write any more blog posts –

because I would have starved to death.

Don’t ever live with a cat.

P.S. I have some blogging cat friends and they’re okay. They never eat my food.

 
32 Comments

Posted by on September 2, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Stomping on Snakes

01 Sep

Jesus sends the 72 in pairsWait a minute. Last week you told me a story about Jesus healing that blind man, and now you’re telling me He sent His disciples away?

What do you mean, a training mission?

Well, if Jesus is training His disciples, I should get trained too. I’m going with them.

I don’t need to listen to the story. I’ll find it out from those disciples when I follow them.

Okay, I’ll listen.

***

Jesus appointed seventy-two disciples and sent them two by two ahead of Him to every town and place where He was about to go.

He told them, “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into His harvest field. Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.”

***

Those disciples need a guard dog to protect them from those wolves. I’d better go for sure.

***

Jesus told the disciples to stay in the first house they enter if a man of peace is there, and not to move around from house to house. He also said, “When you enter a town and are welcomed, eat what is set before you. Heal the sick who are there and tell them, ‘The kingdom of God is near you.’”

***

Wait! They got free food and then they got to do miracles too?

I’m going on this trip for sure.

***

Then Jesus said to them, “When you enter a town and are not welcomed, go into its streets and say, ‘Even the dust of your town that sticks to our feet we wipe off against you. Yet be sure of this: The kingdom of God is near.’”

***

I like kicking up dust. That sounds like fun.

I am listening.

***

When the seventy-two disciples returned they were full of joy and said, “Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name.”

Jesus said, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven. I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.”

***

I think I’m going to go out and get me a few snakes and scorpions right now.

***

“However,” Jesus said, “do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”

***

Snakes and scorpions, watch out! I’m going to trample on you and then I’m going to escape to heaven where you can’t touch me – ‘cause my name’s written there.

 
11 Comments

Posted by on September 1, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

 

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Thunder in the Air

31 Aug

Bongo waiting at the doorHey person. You’re breaking all the rules.

You are not supposed to leave me alone here when there’s thunder in the air.

Well, I know there wasn’t when you left me – but there is now.

You’re not supposed to leave me alone when thunder might be in the air.

Take me with you next time – or don’t even leave the house.

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Bongo and Toby on a walk

Toby and his person came over to go for a walk with me.

I tried to tell them I don’t do walks when there’s thunder in the air.

They wouldn’t listen.

Nobody listens to me.

So I pulled right out of my collar.

They brought me back home.

And left me all alone with thunder in the air.

At least you came home right when the boomers were getting loud.

How come your hair’s wet? It didn’t start raining until after you got home.

Did you go take a shower somewhere?

You have a shower right here. Why would you go somewhere else to take a shower?

Rain shower? What do you mean, rain shower?

It wasn’t raining until after you got home.

You mean there was rain and thunder somewhere else?

You mean it’s everywhere? There’s no way to escape it?

Well that settles it then.

No walks for you today.

Bongo sleeping under a blanket

I’m staying right here under my thunder blanket. Don’t even try to budge me.

 
24 Comments

Posted by on August 31, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Do Lizards Jump?

30 Aug

Lizard on a logDo lizards jump?

My person says they do – or at least this one lizard jumps.

She says she saw it jump twice.

I’ve never seen a lizard jump.

I’ve seen lots of lizards scurry away when I come near.

They usually keep going until they find a rock or a bush to hide under.

For some reason lizards don’t seem to like me.

I don’t know why. I’ve never bothered one.

 

But I’ve never seen a lizard jump.

Looking Away

Okay, I admit I was looking the other way when my person saw that lizard jump.

Or says she saw that lizard jump.

I think she’s making it up.

I don’t see any videos of a lizard jumping.

You’d think if she saw a lizard doing something so unusual she’d take a video of it.

It happened too fast?

Some excuse. You say it happened twice.

You should have been ready for it the second time.

I think we need some witnesses around here.

I’m inviting all my friends to come out on my trails with me.

Lizard on a tree

We’ll see if anyone spots a lizard that jumps.

 
23 Comments

Posted by on August 30, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Time to Move

29 Aug

Bongo looking at the viewI am so excited!

Just when I was losing confidence in all those builders, some of them are coming through.

You probably don’t know what I’m talking about, do you?

Or even what I’m looking at.

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Maybe if I get a little closer you’ll be able to see what I’m looking at.

Bongo looking at a distant house and red rocks

No, not the rocks back there.

Look again.

I guess I’ve got to explain it to you.

Well a couple weeks ago I was exploring my trails and I found a house that somebody was building for me.

And then a couple days later I found another house being built for me.

There was just one thing wrong.

Neither house had a roof.

This is the rainy season here. I mean, what good is a house without a roof in the rain.

My girlfriends wouldn’t want to come to either of my houses if it meant they would end up wet.

But look! One of my new houses has a roof on it now.

I’d better gather up all my friends.

House under construction

My new house is waiting for me to move in.

 
28 Comments

Posted by on August 29, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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Bible Study Buddy

28 Aug

Bongo and a friend in church officeWhat do you mean, this might be the last time I get to hang out with my Bible study buddy for awhile?

You know how much I like going to church. Why wouldn’t I get to go?

How am I going to keep up with my Bible stories if I don’t get to go to Bible study?

You know I’m the perfect dog when I’m there.

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.

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I don’t do anything like…

Bongo going after something in his friend's pocket

trying to steal chocolates out of my friend’s pocket.

And you know I would never…

Bongo on his back in front of a friend

try to be the center of attention.

No, all I do is lie there quietly and listen to what’s going on.

How come you didn’t get any pictures of me doing that?

You had plenty of opportunity.

So why don’t I get to go again?

What? Thunder season is almost over?

It is?

Yippee! Woo woo!

Wait a minute. You mean I got special privileges just because of the thunder?

Umm. Maybe you could tell the thunder to stick around longer.

Or then again – maybe not.

Now I’m all confused.

Can I just have special privileges without the thunder?

Bongo and a friend smiling

You know all my Bible study buddies are waiting to see me again.

 
20 Comments

Posted by on August 28, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

 

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