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Category Archives: humor

Bird Tree

The birds on my trails are mostly a transient population. (I don’t know what that means, but my person made me write it.)

Anyway, we get different birds around here all the time.

A few birds hang around here all year, like the quail and the scrub jays, but mostly the birds come and the birds go.

But we always seem to have some kind of birds hanging around here.

Today I was walking on my trails and I heard a bunch of those birds singing and when I looked up I noticed something strange.

Someone must have decided that those transient birds needed someplace to hang out, so they designated one of my trail trees as a bird tree.

Because that’s where all the birds were. They were hanging out on that one bird tree.

But that tree got so full of birds that they must have had an overflow because they had to open up a second bird tree.

Across my trail from the first bird tree was another one.

I wonder if this second bird tree is for second class birds – the birds that aren’t allowed in the first tree.

Those second class birds do seem to be hiding so it’s hard to see that they’re in there.

I guess it’s embarrassing to be a second class bird in a second class tree.

I’m sure glad I’m a dog and not a bird.

Because all my trails are first class.

27 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 26, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Bird, bird tree, Pets, Trail, Tree

Treasure on the Trail

25 Jun

This is really awesome! This is so cool!

Yesterday I found a money tree on my trails and today a found a pearl.

A trail pearl.

How many people find pearls on trails?

My person says pearls are usually found near the ocean. In something called oysters.

I’ve never seen the ocean and I have no clue what an oyster is.

But I do know that pearls are valuable and I’ve found one. Right here on my trails.

Now I’ve got to figure out what to do with my trail pearl.

I’ve got lots of money to buy all the treats I want from the money tree I found.

So I’m going to have to use this pearl to buy something special.

Like maybe a trip to the ocean so I can find some more pearls.

Or better yet, why don’t I just bring the ocean here. I’ll build a swimming pool in my backyard and put oysters in it.

And I can go swimming anytime I want.

And have pool parties too. I could invite all my dog friends over for pool parties.

With lots of treats that I bought with all the money from my money tree.

What, person?

What do you mean that’s not a pearl? Of course it’s a pearl.

What else could it be?

They’re what?

All over my yard in different colors?

You mean I’m really rich? I have different colored pearls in my own yard?

I wonder which color is worth the most. Probably the one I found on my trails because it’s so pearly looking.

What do you mean my younger person left those pearls in my yard? Is my younger person rich and I didn’t know it?

Airsoft pellets? What are those?

Are they anything like pearls?

Little plastic pellets from an airsoft gun? And they’re hardly worth anything?

I don’t believe you person. You’re just saying that so you can keep all the pearls to yourself.

I’ll be out looking for more pearls.

You can’t fool me.

31 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 25, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Oyster, Pearl, Pets, Trail

I’m Rich!

24 Jun

I found it! I found it! I’m rich! I’m rich!

I just found the best treasure ever on my trails.

I didn’t have to dig for it. It’s not a buried treasure.

No. It’s right here in plain sight.

Well, it’s a little ways off my trail and that’s probably why nobody found it before me.

But now I found it, and it’s mine.

Oh, you can’t tell what this plant is that’s hanging out behind me?

It’s a money tree! And it’s all mine.

Can you imagine what I can do with all the money from this tree?

All the treats I can buy?

I’ll be in treat heaven. And then everybody will be coming and giving me loves so they can have some of my treats.

What? You can’t tell this is a money tree?

Check this out.

Do you see the coins hanging on this tree?

Look. They’re all over it.

Now don’t get any ideas.

I found this tree and it’s mine.

I’m not telling anyone where it is.

But if you’re real nice to me…

I might give you a coin so you can buy a treat.

Click here to find more mischievous pets.

51 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 24, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Coin, Hiking, money tree, Pets, Trail, Treats, Tree

Two Fish and Five Loaves

23 Jun

English: Jesus feeding a crowd with 5 loaves of bread and two fish (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Alright! Coming up is one of my favorite stories about Jesus.

It’s a food story, and for those of you who know me, you know that food is one of my favorite things.

Okay person, I’m listening. Bring on the food!

***

People were coming and going so much that Jesus and his disciples didn’t have a chance to eat…

***

Wait a minute! I thought this was a story about food. Not a story about no food.

I’ll listen. But it’s hard to have patience when you’re hungry.

***

So Jesus took the disciples and they went away to a quiet place by boat.

But many people saw them leaving and they ran ahead, so that when Jesus landed on shore he saw a large crowd.

Jesus had compassion on the people and He healed their sick and began teaching them many things.

***

So where’s the food?

I’m running out of patience.

***

Late in the day the disciples came to Jesus and said, “Send the people away so they can go to the surrounding countryside and villages and buy themselves something to eat.”

***

You mean there wasn’t any food there?

I am listening.

***

But Jesus said to the disciples, “You give them something to eat.”

“What?” the disciples said. “It would take eight months wages to feed all these people. How are we going to do that?”

Jesus said, “How many loaves do you have? Go and see.”

They found a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish.

***

Fish? Did you say fish? There’s not enough fish for all those people. You’d better give the fish to me.

I am settled down. Do I get the fish now?

***

Jesus directed the people to sit down in groups on the grass.

Jesus took the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves.

He gave them to the disciples to give to the people.

***

Here I am. I’m sitting in a group of my own. Bring on the fish!

***

When the food was distributed to the people and they had eaten everything they wanted, the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces of bread and fish.

The number of people who had eaten was about five thousand men, plus the women and children.

***

What are they going to do with those leftovers? They shouldn’t let them go to waste.

Hey Jesus! Over here! I’ll take care of those leftovers for you.

14 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 23, 2013 in Bongo, Dogology, humor

Tags: Bible, bread, Christianity, dogs, faith, Fish, God, Jesus, Pets, Religion and Spirituality

Gizmo’s Gone

22 Jun

One of my friends came over today and I was really happy to see him. He hardly ever comes over here so it was a special treat.

Until I discovered that all he wanted to do was say hi to Gizmo.

This is becoming a regular pattern around here. What’s going on? Why am I losing out to a cat so often lately?

Come on! What about me? I can give better loves than a cat any day.

See if you ever get kisses like that from Gizmo.

What? Holding Gizmo now?

Your arms are going to get tired.

You don’t have to hold me. Just attach yourself to my leash and I’ll take you wherever you want to go.

Besides, I don’t think Gizmo likes being held. I’d never hold him.

You’d better put him down and give me a few loves.

Hey! Where are you putting Gizmo?

When I said to put him down I just meant on the floor or the couch.

Gizmo, what are you doing in there? This is terrible.

I wouldn’t wish a cage on anyone. Not even a cat.

Well, maybe Scratchy. But he always gets out of his cage eventually.

Hold on Gizmo! I’ll rescue you.

Maybe if I push this thing over we’ll find a way for you to escape.

Noooo! Where are you going Gizmo?

Your younger person’s house? That’s one of your younger people? How many people do you have anyway?

This is terrible! Just when I was getting used to having Gizmo around.

Oh, ummm. I mean, good riddance Gizmo. One less cat around to harass me.

Scratchy, don’t you have an extra younger person around that can take you away?

Click here for more great pet blogs.

30 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 22, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Cat, cat cage, Cats and Dogs, Gizmo, Pets, Scratchy

Naked Bugs

21 Jun

I hope I didn’t gross anyone out with this picture here. I told my person to leave the other one off. It was grosser.

I thought maybe I was in an alien science fiction movie when I saw these things.

People say there are aliens here – so maybe I’ve found some.

Or maybe this is something else.

These look like bug clothes to me – and they’re missing their bugs.

So that means there are some naked bugs flying around my trails.

I think I’ve seen some of them, but they’re so embarrassed that they get away quickly.

When I get near a tree where one of those naked bugs is hanging out, the bug makes a loud noise that sounds halfway between a chirp and a click, and then flies off really fast.

It’s too bad that bug flies off so fast. If it would just stick around for a few minutes I could tell it where its clothes are.

Or maybe it doesn’t want its clothes.

I’ve heard of people that like to go around naked. I’ve never seen any, but I’ve heard about them.

Maybe these bugs are like those people.

Is there a nudist colony for bugs?

I wonder if there’s a place on my trails where a whole bunch of naked bugs hang out together.

That sounds like a pretty scary place.

I wonder if they allow their nymphs to go there.

I think I’ll wander on home now.

I’m hoping not to find that naked bug nudist colony for nymphs anytime soon.

25 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 21, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: cicada, cicada exoskeleton, Pets

Who’s into Mischief?

20 Jun

My person left the house early this morning. I don’t really like it when she does that, but it does give me more chances to get into mischief.

And what my person doesn’t know won’t hurt her.

So I got on her bed and messed it up. There’s two cats now, so I can always blame them if my person says anything.

I checked out the litter box. What?! My person cleaned it before she left? That’s not fair.

Then I looked to see if there was any cat food left.

This is not good. My person is getting better about remembering to put the cat food where I can’t reach it.

I hear somebody at the door. It can’t be my person. I didn’t hear her car. I heard another car though.

It’s my friend who comes sometimes when my person’s not here.

Don’t anybody tell my person that I have a friend over when she’s gone. I might get in trouble.

Hey wait a minute!

My friend let me go outside, but now she’s ignoring me.

She’s paying attention to Gizmo!

What is this?

Gizmo, go hide in the bedroom or something. This is my friend. She came to see me.

What do you mean, she was your friend first?

You used to live with her?

And now you live with me?

I don’t know what to make of this.

How can I have secret mischief if you’re the one having a friend over and not me?

Gizmo, I’m telling. You’re not supposed to have friends over when my – oh, I have to say “our” now – person is gone.

34 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 20, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Cat, Cat food, Cats and Dogs, Gizmo, Litter box, mischief, Pets

Fitting the Clues Together

19 Jun

What is this? What are all these branches doing on the ground? I’d better check this out.

I’ve had so many mysteries on my trails lately. It’s been keeping Detective Dog busy.

Speaking of Detective Dog, I’d better get my hat on.

There, that’s better. Now I can delve into this mystery.

Wait a minute! There’s a tree right here that’s missing a bunch of branches.

I wonder if – I wonder if…

No, it’s not possible.

Could all of these branches have fallen off of this tree?

No, when I look closer I see that there’s been some hacking going on.

Somebody hacked these branches off this tree.

I wonder who it could be.

Look here! Is this another clue?

This hacked tree is right next to the prickly pear cactus that I found damaged awhile back.

And over there is the other tree that lost its branches.

I just realized where we are.

Right over there is the place where the Litter Bugs hang out.

This will make my job really easy.

All I have to do is find those Litter Bugs.

I bet they’ll be able to tell me who damaged this tree.

22 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 19, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Detective Dog, Litter Bugs, Pets, prickly pear, Tree, vandalism

Ocotillo All Over

18 Jun

Last year my person and I took an extra long walk on trails that we hardly ever go on, because my person said that was the only place on my trails where the ocotillo grow.

Well, she lied.

Because we went on a trail that we sometimes go on – but the last time we went on it there was a sign on the part that goes back to our house saying it was closed. The sign said they wanted more cactus to grow on it – or something like that.

And besides that there were two people cuddling with each other this time.

I would have gone right up to those people and got some loves too, but my person said we could take the long way back.

The long way goes parallel (I don’t know what that word is – my person made me use it) to my regular trail, but it’s higher up the hill. My person says she hasn’t been on it in a very long time and I’m not sure if I’ve been on it at all. At least it doesn’t smell familiar.

So we were walking along on this long way trail and there they were.

Bunches of ocotillo just hanging out on the side of the hill.

They were even blooming with their little red flowers on top.

I’m still not sure why my person cares about these things though. I mean, look how tall and skinny they are.

If I was that skinny my person would probably take me to the vet for treats and loves.

I sure hope my person doesn’t try to take some of my treats and bring them up here to these ocotillo plants to fatten them up.

I think I’d better head back home now so I can keep a close eye on my treats.

Oh no, I forgot.

There’s a tame ocotillo across the street at my neighbor dog Toby’s house.

Toby, quick! Hide your treats!

20 Comments

Posted by Bongo on June 18, 2013 in Bongo, dogs, humor

Tags: Hiking, ocotillo, Outdoors, Pets, Photography, Recreation, Sedona, Sedona Arizona, Trail, Walking

Campfire Criminal

17 Jun

Something smells terribly awry on my trails.

Wait, maybe I used the wrong word. I don’t smell any rye bread anywhere.

Something smells fishy?

Did I say fishy? Where’s the fish? Where? Where?

Oh, no fish. I don’t even smell any. Guess I’d better find another word.

Let’s see- it smells like the charcoal remains of a former fire. Like a barbecue without the meat.

No meat! There’s got to be some criminal offense here.

I’d better get my Detective Dog hat on.

What happened here?

Someone had a fire on my trails and didn’t invite me.

And I bet they had treats and goodies and stuff like hot dogs and s‘ mores.

And they didn’t invite me.

Wait a minute!

No wonder they didn’t invite me.

They’re not even supposed to have a fire on my trails – and even if they could, fire restrictions are in effect. No fires anywhere.

It’s really dry out here. My puddle hasn’t even shown itself in a long time.

I bet those people know that as Detective Dog – a law abiding citizen dog (well almost) – I would be required to turn them in if I discovered who they are.

And I certainly wouldn’t want my trails to burn up.

So I’m investigating this one for sure.